Wedding meaning. Marriage before the Lord, or why you need a wedding in the church

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A church wedding is a sacred rite that gives the husband and wife a church blessing for a happy family life, the birth of children. Many couples decide to hold this beautiful and touching event. But in order for the rite to be not just a tribute to fashion, but to become a serious deliberate step, it is worth knowing its features.

Important conditions for a wedding

It is allowed to get married on the wedding day or after a time: a week, a month, years. The main thing is that all conditions stipulated by the church are observed.

Who can get married

An important condition for the ceremony is the presence of a marriage certificate. In addition, spouses must be baptized Orthodox Christians. However, in some cases, a wedding may be allowed if the spouse is a non-Orthodox Christian, provided that the children born in marriage will be baptized in Orthodoxy. It is also important to match the age of marriage: the bride must be 16 years old, the groom - 18. Do not be afraid of rejection if the wife is pregnant, because, according to the church, children should be born in a married marriage. The wedding can be held even if the spouses have not received a parental blessing, since it can be replaced by the blessing of the confessor.

There are not so many restrictions for the sacrament of the wedding. The Church will not approve of the ceremony between unbaptized, atheists, blood, and also spiritual relatives, for example, between the godparents of a child, between the godfather and the godson. This ceremony is allowed to be held no more than three times. It is also forbidden to get married if this will already be your fourth officially registered marriage.

When is the ceremony allowed?

Often, newlyweds decide to get married on the day with the official registration of marriage. But, given that such a sacrament of Orthodoxy is a rather serious step, you should not rush into the ceremony: it can be postponed until the birth of a child or carried out after several years of official marriage.

This ceremony is not performed every day. Newlyweds are crowned 4 days a week on Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays. However, it should be borne in mind that there are 4 fasts throughout the year, during which church marriages are not concluded:
- Christmas - lasts November 28 - January 6;
- Great - seven weeks before Orthodox Easter;
- Petrov - depends on the date of Easter, lasts from 8 to 42 days;
- Assumption - lasts August 14 - 27.

Also, the church will refuse to hold a wedding on significant days:
- September 11 - Beheading of John the Baptist;
- September 27 - Exaltation of the Holy Cross;
- from January 7 to January 19 - Christmas time;
- on Maslenitsa;
- for Bright Week (the week after Easter).

Even if the day you have chosen does not fall on the dates listed, it is still better to go to church to clarify everything with the priest. In addition, the bride must calculate that there are no “critical days” on the chosen date, since it is impossible to appear at this time in the church.

What should precede the wedding ceremony

It is necessary to prepare spiritually for this rite. This means that before the wedding, the bride and groom need to pray, confess, take communion, endure a three-day fast (it is necessary to refrain from food of animal origin). Newlyweds before marriage should not enter into carnal relations, and this condition also applies to a couple who decided to get married after several years of marriage. They need to refrain from close relationships for several days before the ceremony.

Preparing for the sacrament of the wedding

Choosing a church, communicating with a priest

To decide where to get married, you can walk through different churches and choose the church where you feel most comfortable. For a magnificent, solemn ceremony, a large cathedral is suitable, for a quiet, solitary ceremony - a small church. Since the priest is an important character in the rite, it is worth taking a responsible approach to his choice.

The wedding ceremony must be booked in advance (a few weeks in advance). It is also worth discussing all the questions with the priest in advance: the duration of the wedding, what you need to bring with you, whether it is possible to take photographs, etc. It is worth considering that this is a paid ceremony, but in some churches its exact cost is set, in others voluntary donations are provided. This issue should also be discussed with the priest. Moreover, "additional services" are often provided, for example, bell ringing, church choir.

Choice of guarantors

Two guarantors (witnesses) are chosen, as a rule, from relatives. It is worth considering that they must be baptized. It is not allowed to take divorced spouses as guarantors, a couple living in an illegal, "civil" marriage. Their spiritual duties are similar to the duties of godparents: they must spiritually lead the family they are creating. Therefore, it is not customary to invite young people who are not familiar with married life as guarantors. If there are difficulties in finding witnesses, it is allowed to conduct the sacrament of the wedding without them.

Choice of outfit

Bride

The bride's wedding dress should be no higher than the knees, should cover the shoulders and preferably the arms, should not have a deep neckline (you can use long gloves, a cape, a bolero, an openwork shawl, a stole, etc.). It is advisable to give preference to light colors along with dark and bright colors (purple, blue, black) should be abandoned. Sundresses and trouser suits are not suitable for the ceremony. The bride's head must be covered. Considering that church crowns (crowns) are worn on the young during the ceremony, you should not cover the bride's head with a big hat, as it will look out of place.
You can wear any shoes, but when choosing it, you should take into account that you will have to stand in it for quite some time, so it is better to refuse uncomfortable shoes with heels. To decide on a hairstyle, it is advisable to check with the priest in advance whether crowns will be worn on the head or guarantors will hold them. The bride's makeup should not be too noticeable, it is also worth remembering that it is forbidden to kiss a crown, cross, icon with painted lips.
It is believed that a wedding dress cannot be given or sold. It must be stored together with baptismal shirts, wedding candles, icons.
Groom
For the wedding, the groom will suit a formal suit. There are no special prohibitions regarding the color of the suit. You should not come to church in casual, denim, sportswear. The groom should not have a headdress.
Guests
Guests entering the temple must comply with the requirements for all parishioners: for women - closed-type clothing, hats, trouser suits are undesirable, for men - strict clothing, without a headdress.
In addition, all participants and those present at the wedding ceremony: the bride, groom, guarantors and guests must wear pectoral crosses.

What to prepare for the ceremony

For the wedding you will need:
- rings that must be given to the priest before the ceremony for consecration;
- wedding candles;
- wedding icons (images of Christ and the Virgin);
- a white towel-towel (young people will stand on it during the ceremony);
- two handkerchiefs (to hold candles).

The towel, on which the bride and groom stood during the wedding in the temple, symbolizes the path of life, so it must be kept and not given to anyone. You should also store wedding candles that can be lit during difficult births, illnesses of children.

Photographer's Choice

It is important to note that not all churches allow video or photography of the wedding ceremony. Therefore, it is worth discussing this issue with the priest in advance. Considering that the lighting in temples is specific, it is advisable to choose a professional photographer who will take into account the nuances of shooting, be able to choose the right angles, take high-quality pictures that convey the atmosphere of the temple and the grandeur of the wedding ceremony.

wedding ceremony

This ritual includes betrothal and wedding. It is worth considering that during the ceremony, the priest must call the newlyweds the names that were given to them at baptism (sometimes they differ from the names "in the world"). betrothal passes at the entrance to the church. The bride should stand to the left of the groom. The priest blesses the newlyweds and hands them lit wedding candles, which must be kept until the end of the service. After the prayer, he changes the wedding rings from the man's hand to the woman's hand three times. After that, they become a bride and groom.

Wedding is held in the center of the temple, where the bride and groom will stand on a white towel. During the ceremony, the priest reads prayers, the guarantors hold crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. After answering the priest’s questions, “Is the wedding performed out of good will?” "Are there any obstacles?" and reading prayers, the newlyweds become spouses before God. Now they can kiss the crowns and drink wine in three steps from the cup, which symbolizes family life with joys and sorrows. After the priest leads them around the lectern, brings them to the Royal Doors, the husband kisses the icon of Christ, and the wife kisses the Mother of God. Now the guests can congratulate the newlyweds.

Remember that the wedding is not just a memorable, bright holiday, but also a very responsible step, which is worth taking once in a lifetime. Church divorce (dethronement) of spouses is possible only under serious circumstances, with the permission of the diocese. Therefore, the union of one's life before God and the sacrament of the wedding itself should be taken seriously, with understanding and taking into account all traditions and rules.

A wedding in the Orthodox Church is one of the seven main sacraments, and believers try to observe the rules for it as carefully as possible. Wedding along with baptism, chrismation, repentance, communion, priesthood and unction constitute the center of spiritual life and embody the fullness of a person's entry into church life. Everything that the bride and groom need to know before such a responsible step as a wedding, you will read in our detailed article. It will also be of interest to those who have already performed the sacrament but want to learn more about it.

The meaning of wedding in the Orthodox Church

According to the Christian worldview, two people unite in a God-sanctified union and become one flesh. That is why divorces, so common today in a Christian environment, are considered an unnatural phenomenon, as if a mother decided not to live with her child. Sometimes such a gap is associated with the amputation of a limb or organ - a painful process that makes a person inferior.

The Lord created Adam and Eve and blessed them to multiply and fruit the earth. Adam immediately recognized spiritual and physical kinship with his wife: the first thing when he saw Eve, he called her his flesh and blood, because he loved her:

“And the man said, Behold, this is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of [her] husband” (Gen. 2:23).

Therefore, before taking this step, people should be aware of the seriousness that they promise God by this act.

Young love, as well as long-awaited love, is characterized by haste and a vision of your partner in “pink” colors. The virtues that any person has - since everyone is created in the image of God and inherited perfect features from Him - a loving person perceives exaggeratedly and it seems to him that the object of love is perfect. At the same time, its shortcomings - which everyone also has, since we all have been subjected to original sin and its consequences in the form of illness, death and passions - seem to be smoothed out and are not amenable to rational analysis.

Therefore, in the temple, where the young people came to talk with the priest about the upcoming event, one can meet an unexpected reaction from the church minister. So, if the priest observes the charter of the holy fathers and honors traditions, then he will advise the lovers to wait at least a year before the wedding, during which you can get to know the person better in different circumstances and experience their feelings in practice.

At the same time, this year is not blessed to live an intimate life. In the case when the young people came after the established relationship and put the priest before the fact, he explains to them that early sexual intimacy before legal marriage leads to adverse consequences for further relationships and their strength.

After an explanatory conversation, if the young people realized their guilt, the priest invites them to fast for three days, then confess their sins and take communion. On the eve of the wedding, the newlyweds must take communion in order to feel this day as the most important in life - the day when two destinies become one destiny, two souls become one soul and two bodies become one body.

How to prepare for the wedding?

First you need to choose a day, a place for the wedding and notify the priest in advance. At the same time, it must be remembered that this sacrament is not allowed to be performed in the Orthodox Church every day of the year.

The sacrament of the wedding is not performed on Tuesdays and Thursdays, since these days precede the fasts that believers observe on Wednesday and Friday. Also, the sacrament is not performed on Saturday, since Sunday (and the church day begins at 20:00 the day before) is a small Easter, a consecrated day.

Also, you can’t get married on the days of the fasts established by the Ecumenical Councils - these are 4 fasts a year with a total duration of 5-6 months with different intervals.

As a rule, an age-old tradition of weddings on Krasnaya Gorka has been established in the Orthodox Church of Russia - this is the name of the holiday on the first Sunday after Easter. This day is called Antipascha in the church calendar and marks the beginning of the period of national wedding festivities, which took place en masse in Russia at all times.

The sacrament is also not performed on the eve of single fasting days - for example, on September 11 on the feast of the Beheading of John the Baptist; on special days of joy and celebration after the Great and Nativity fasts - at Christmas time and Bright Week; before and during the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross.

After choosing a day, it is necessary to start preparing, which, first of all, does not include the external preparation of individual items, inviting guests and a plan of events for the celebration - but the internal state of the newlyweds, which consists in preparing for the sacrament of Confession and. Both sacraments necessarily precede such an important event. After all, the Lord calls the Kingdom of Heaven a wedding feast, and Communion at such a feast on the day of marriage is the communion of God's love and strengthening for the entire future joint path through life.

The priest appoints the time of the wedding immediately after the liturgy, which is held every morning. Ideally, if the newlyweds manage to defend the liturgy and take communion on it immediately on the eve of the celebration. After all, it is much more important to spend your strength on contributing to the sacrament than to save it for evening festivities (which it is desirable to avoid and leave guests as early as possible for solitude).

What do you need to get married in a church?

The rules for preparing for a wedding in the Orthodox Church are mainly in the internal awareness and responsibility for this step. In the understanding that there is no way back and all the difficulties of character, adjustments, disagreements - can now not be a reason for terminating the union that God has sanctified.

This is a serious step, but many today take it lightly, not counting on the strength and strength of feelings. Unfortunately, such people do not understand that after the breakup of a married union, it will be more difficult to make the next family harmonious and you should take care of what you have.

And already in the second place, it is necessary to prepare an outfit, documents, items for the sacrament and other things necessary on this day.

What you need for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, the list:

Certificate of registration of marriage. According to the rules established by the Holy Synod, marriages not registered with the registry office cannot be married. Such conditions are dictated primarily by the seriousness of the intentions of the newlyweds, because after the revolution and the collapse of the Russian Empire, the church lost the authority to influence the rights and obligations of the parties, the function of regulating legal relations is now performed by the registry office.
Icons of the Savior and the Mother of God. What icons are needed for a wedding? Any images and salaries will do, but the main thing is that they can be picked up without any problems. This pious tradition used to mean the blessing of parents on marriage and was inherited - from the side of the bride, the icon of the Most Holy Theotokos, and from the side of the groom, the icon of the Savior. The blessing of the parents had sacred value and was sacredly observed.
Golden wedding rings. Previously, a woman's wedding ring was silver, reminding that in a Christian family a woman is an assistant to her husband and submits to a loving spouse. The husband had a golden ring, which corresponded to the symbolism of the royal metal - like Christ, the husband is obliged to love his wife, who symbolizes the Church. It is the husband who will be responsible for his family before God at the Judgment.
Wedding candles. They can be purchased locally at the temple. They are a symbol of the grace of the Holy Spirit, which invisibly stands and sanctifies.
White board. It can be either an ordinary white towel purchased, or a linen hand-embroidered by the bride (which was often practiced before). Can also be purchased locally at the Temple. He is laid on the floor and gets up during a certain moment in the process of the sacrament. Plath symbolizes the purity of the thoughts and aspirations of those who are getting married.
Some temples have a fixed amount of donations for the sacrament. The cost must be paid before the sacrament, so as not to forget about it after. If there is no fixed fee, then you can leave a voluntary donation after the wedding. It should be remembered that the state does not provide church workers with salaries and their living depends on our donations.
Worthy appearance of those who are getting married. The girl (woman) should have a headdress (a scarf or a more magnificent wedding veil), closed shoulders, the outfit should be modest, covering the knees and not having a deep neckline. The man must be in trousers. Shorts, breeches and other cropped options that expose the legs are not allowed for a man in the temple. The color of the outfit for the bride is better to choose light, pastel colors. Traditionally, a pure chaste girl emphasizes her innocence with a completely white dress and fresh flowers in her hands. It is better to choose shoes for the bride that are comfortable, with flat soles, in order to defend the service without any problems.

After the church has lost a legitimate civil power capable of regulating legal matters, the presence of witnesses is not mandatory and is rather a pious tradition. The witnesses were the guarantors of the spouses, they knew them well. Experienced witnesses with their own families were invited, who in difficult situations could give practical advice.

What rules of wedding in the Orthodox Church do you need to know?

How to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church - the priest who was chosen by the newlyweds to conduct their sacrament will explain in an accessible way. But the general rules remain the same.

A marriage registered by the registry office is a graceless, but not lawless cohabitation. This form is respected by the church and is allowed in the case when a church marriage cannot be performed. And it cannot be done in several cases:

when a civil marriage has been registered more than three times - according to church canons, one cannot marry more than three times;
when one or both spouses do not belong to the Orthodox Church, are not baptized or are not brought voluntarily;
when there was no actual dissolution of the marriage with the previous spouse: for civil registration, a certificate of divorce is required, for church registration, the blessing of the bishop for entering into a new marriage;
when the bride and groom are in blood or spiritual relationship - including if they are godparents of one person;
the rules for the age of those getting married in the Orthodox Church are limited to the upper threshold of 60 years for a woman and 70 for a man, the lower threshold is 16 years for a girl and 18 for a guy.

During the preparation for the wedding, all controversial points in matters of worldview should be spoken out so that the sacrament is performed with a pure heart.

How long does the wedding in the church take - 40-60 minutes.

What to do with wedding candles and other attributes after the wedding?

From such family heirlooms, you can arrange a small collection. For this purpose, they start a separate box, where they put the attributes after the wedding, baptism and other memorable family events. The box can be shown to children, highlighting the details of a significant day in front of them, refreshing their own memory and plunging into memories of happy events. There you can also put various souvenirs brought from the pilgrimage.

Wedding candles can be lit during prayer to ask God for something important for the family, for special gratitude to Him, or at other times.

All these things are reminders of important milestones in the development of the family and are part of the emotional life of family members. At the same time, they do not carry sacred value by themselves. If for some reason the relics were not needed, they can be eliminated in a special way. Since the objects participated in the holy rite, it is better to burn them - on your own or transfer them to the church with a request to dispose of the consecrated candles and objects that participated in the sacrament.

Seeing wedding symbols in front of them, spouses can, through memories, find ways in mutual understanding when difficult moments arise, through tangible evidence of their union, which they entered into before God, spouses remember the importance of the family hearth and draw new strength to walk through life together hand in hand. hand.

The wedding rules in the Orthodox Church consist, first of all, of a moral basis, which consists in purity of intentions, the absence of selfish and dishonorable goals, and a firm determination to unite with a loved one together. The purpose of such a union is to receive from the Lord the gift of unanimity for the Christian life and the upbringing of children. You can learn more about the wedding from the book.

The wedding ceremony is a very ancient custom that has not lost its relevance over time. To this day, happy lovers, having sealed themselves by marriage in the registry office, go to church to testify their union before God. There are certain rules for the wedding, how to prepare for this sacred sacrament, as well as how it happens - you will learn from this article.

Unfortunately, not all people can be admitted to this ceremony. So, the wedding will be unavailable for you in such cases:

If you have already addressed this ritual three times. But even the second wedding in a row will be quite problematic.
In the case when one of the lovers or both at once adhere to non-Christianity, were not baptized in an Orthodox church and have no desire to be baptized before the wedding.
If one of the lovers has a valid church or civil marriage union (in the first situation, permission from the bishop will be required to terminate the union).
It is forbidden to marry people who have a closely related relationship (up to the fourth generation). Also, a wedding is not allowed in the case of spiritual kinship (for example, for godfather and godfather, godson and godparent, and so on).
The ban applies to mentally ill people.
Also, the priest will not agree to marry atheists who resort to the ceremony not for spiritual reasons, but for some other reasons (at the will of their parents, as a tribute to fashion, and so on).
To get married, you must have a marriage registration certificate, as well as passports with stamps.
A girl can get married in a church if she is already a full sixteen years old, and a guy - from eighteen years old.

What you need for the wedding ceremony

If you want to film the ritual on video or take a photo, be sure to discuss these points in advance. It is important that in the process of the sacred sacrament nothing should distract the clergyman and all those gathered from the rite.

Witnesses who were baptized in an Orthodox church are important for the wedding. Think about who is best suited for this role - after all, the best men will have to keep the crown over the heads of the newlyweds throughout the ritual. Therefore, it is advisable to choose witnesses of high stature and fairly hardy.

Beforehand, you will need to stock up on such a necessary arsenal:

The duration of the wedding ceremony is about sixty minutes, so make sure you also provide yourself with comfortable shoes.

How to prepare for the ritual

The most important aspect is to be in a harmonious state of mind and sincerely desire to perform this rite.

In addition, three days before the wedding, the newlyweds will need to fast. Confession and communion are also performed before the wedding.

By default, the beginning of the wedding is twelve o'clock at night, from this time you need to refrain from drinking food, water, alcoholic beverages and not smoking. Sexual contacts are forbidden.

Upon arrival at the church, the newlyweds will first need to confess and take communion, and after that they will change into a special wedding attire.

What should be the behavior in the church

The temple is a sacred place in which it is worth adhering to certain rules of conduct, namely:

Women put on headdresses, pectoral crosses and proper clothes, cover their arms and legs;
You need to make up before the trip within reason;
They come to the church fifteen minutes before the start of the ceremony, light candles and venerate the images;
In the temple, you must turn off your cell phone;
It is forbidden to talk while serving;
When the ceremony is in progress, one cannot move around the temple;
Only the elderly or the sick sit in the church;
The male half occupies the right side of the hall, and the female half occupies the left;
It is not allowed to approach the altar;
It is forbidden in the church to hold each other's hands;
Hands should not be put in pockets;
Do not turn their backs on the icons;
If for some reason you are unable to endure the entire wedding ceremony, it would be best to stand at the entrance to the church, but not leave the service before the scheduled time;
Orthodox people should be baptized with the right hand.

It is important that both the people who are getting married and the guests who are present at the ceremony, by all means adhere to the described rules.

How is a wedding ceremony performed in the Orthodox Church?

An Orthodox wedding is performed in two stages:

the first is betrothal;
and the second is the wedding itself.

The ceremony itself goes like this:

At the beginning, the deacon brings out the rings on a special dish.
The priest approaches the newlyweds and hands them lit candles.
Then the clergyman holds a dish in front of the young, on which the rings lie, and invites them to exchange them 3 times. The bride and groom must first pass the rings to each other on a tray three times and then put on their own. This personifies consent, mutual assistance and unity in a marriage union.
After these actions, the priest takes the crown of the newlywed, and baptizes him with this wreath. Then he gives the groom to touch his lips to the image of the Savior, fixed on the crown. Then the crown is placed on the head of the newlywed.
A similar ceremony is performed for the bride. But the crown of the girl is decorated with the image of the Mother of God, which she must kiss.

Note! The process of placing a wedding crown on the head of the bride and groom symbolizes that from now on they are king and queen for each other.

Then a cup of wine is brought. The priest baptizes it and gives it to the newlyweds, and they must drain the cup to the bottom three times.

The bowl symbolizes the unity of destinies, as well as the readiness to experience both joyful and sad moments in life together.

Then the clergyman unites the right hands of the bride and groom with his hand and holds them around the lectern three times. This action is also symbolic, it marks that from now on young people should always walk hand in hand with each other.
Approaching the royal doors, the groom should kiss the icon of the Savior, and the bride - the Mother of God, then they change places.
In conclusion, the priest allows the young to touch the Cross with their lips and hands over two images: the icon of the Son of God (groom) and the Mother of God (bride). They are taken home and fixed over their bed.

The actions described above make the newlyweds not just legal spouses before the state, but also before the face of the Lord. Terminating a wedding is much more difficult than an ordinary marriage, for this you will need to obtain permission from the clergyman.

Watch the wedding ceremony in the next video

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The birth of a Christian family is accomplished with the blessing of the Church, which unites the two into a single whole in the sacrament of the wedding. There is a special providence of God for such a family, since at its foundation lies the gospel commandment of love.

What does a Christian need to know about this church sacrament, how to prepare for it? This will be our story, intended for the bride and groom preparing for the wedding, or unmarried spouses who lived side by side, perhaps until the golden jubilee. We invite them all to think about a simple question that our great-great-grandmothers and great-great-grandfathers knew so well - for what do people get married?

Why was the wedding persecuted by the enemies of the Church?

Many of our readers, if not present at the church wedding, certainly have an idea about it from numerous films.

First of all, I remember the princess-bride in a snow-white wedding dress. Burning candles, jubilant chants and church prayers. Solemn procession behind the priest around the lectern under the shadow of royal crowns. A bell chime falling from the sky, glorifying the union of love. Many flowers and a stream of joy overflowing the edge of this special day, when before God and people, for the first time, they appeared as husband and wife.

The older generation still remembers how the solemn registration took place in the wedding palace or the regional registry office, accompanied by Mendelssohn's wedding march. And only a few, after the registry office, dared to get married in secret ...

The cases of bygone days now include the era of fierce persecution of: the destruction of temples, the persecution of the clergy, the eradication of faith itself. Our memory does not bleed when faced with the fact of recent reality, when one enterprising leader of the people presumptuously "prophesied" how "the last priest would be shown on television."

This is how the enemies of Christ acted, consistently implementing their monstrous plan for the destruction of Russia, the stronghold of Orthodoxy.

The autocratic power was trampled, the family of the last sovereign of Russia was slandered and shot, so that their icon-painting faces, given to us forever the true image of Christian marriage, would disappear forever from the face of the earth and our memory. A satanic destructive stereotype of human relations begins to take hold. Herodias becomes the ideal of the new woman.

As you know, she was from the Maccabean family and the granddaughter of Herod the Great. She was looking for royal honors and power, which she did not have in her marriage to Herod Philip, her cousin uncle. The blood of many evil and voluptuous ancestors mixed in her veins. She persuaded her husband's brother Herod Antipas, ruler of Galilee, to adulterous marriage.

Being publicly denounced by John the Baptist for violating the law, she, harboring malice, looked for an opportunity to deal with the holy prophet. The instrument of revenge was her daughter Salome. On the day of the anniversary of Herod's accession to the throne, she pleased the ruler and all the guests with her dance, and therefore Herod publicly promised Salome any reward, even up to half of his kingdom. Here is how F.V. describes the events that followed. Farrar.

“The delighted girl ran to consult with her mother, and it was then that Herodias had the opportunity to satisfy her bloodthirsty vindictiveness. “Ask,” she said, for the heads of John the Baptist, so that they would immediately give you the head of this hated prophet on a platter. Herod listened to this request with horror. She sobered him, because she went against all his best convictions. Had he been capable of any courage, he could easily have dismissed this request as being inconsistent with the purpose of his promise. But the false fear of people and the thirst for approval, the passion for popularity, the vanity of power - all this suppressed the best motives in him. An executioner was sent into prison, a sword flashed, and, at the request of a shameless maiden, at the instigation of an adulteress distraught with hatred, due to the conceited weakness of the criminal king, the head of the greatest of those born by women was cut off! This head, laid on a bloody dish, was brought to the princess, and she took it to her mother, who poured out all her hatred over her, to which a worthless angry woman was capable of ”(F.V. Farrar. From the chapter“ Herodes ”in the book "Conscience and the Fall", St. Petersburg, 1998, pp. 120-121).

Subsequently, all three - Herod Antipas, Herodias and her daughter Salome accepted a painful death as God's retribution for the death of the holy prophet of the Lord John the Baptist.

Holy Scripture teaches unreasonable mankind about the ways of a righteous life - “for the Lord knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish” (). And all the same, since the time the world has been standing, humanity has repeatedly fallen into a trap set by the spirits of malice in high places. “You will be like gods,” a seductive whisper is heard. And the light of reason is fading. Where will the scales of free human will now tip? Destroy the family and the man will get lost in the dark forest.

This is not the first time in the history of Christianity that blood has been shed. But the enemies of God cannot overcome the Church. And on the blood of the martyrs, faith is resurrected again. Indestructible is the love for Christ of all those who gave their lives to Him and followed Him, taking up their cross. “God is love,” testifies the Apostle John the Theologian (). Therefore, Christianity itself is a religion of sacrificial love, which has two ways: either consecrate oneself to God and leave the world to pray for it, or, while in the world, keep a blessed marriage, honoring God's commandment: “and God said to them: be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it" (). And God gave a promise to future mankind that “the seed of the woman will erase the head of the serpent” (), seeing through the millennia the modest face of the Most Pure Virgin from the house of Joachim and Anna.

And so the God-Manhood was accomplished. The first thing the Savior did when he entered the path of service was to bless the married couple in Cana of Galilee. According to church tradition, it was the wedding of Simon the Zealot, who was shocked by a miracle that happened - the transformation of water into fine wine. “Here is He, promised by God, the long-awaited Messiah!” revealed to him that day.

Since then, every marriage is performed with the blessing of the Church, the Head of which is the Lord Himself. Moreover, Christian marriage creates its own invisible small church, the head of which is the husband, who stands before the Lord for all his household members. Each of our prayerful sighs is known to God. You just need to be able to give place to God’s care for us and not forget - “what a man sows, that he will also reap: he who sows to his own flesh from the flesh will reap corruption, and he who sows to the Spirit from the Spirit will reap eternal life” ().

And if a husband and wife are outside the church fence, their life passes among the raging passions that reign in this world and destroy fragile human structures. Enmity and quarrels, jealousy and adultery alternate in him in a vicious circle, from which there is no way out for those who reject God's help. This is evidenced by the growing wave of divorces, dooming both children and adults to loneliness.

Take care of honor from a young age

We all know this proverb, set by Pushkin as an epigraph to the story "The Captain's Daughter". But it was an epigraph to the very life of a Russian person, to his whole way of life and being.

Alexander Vasilievich Suvorov therefore multiplied the glory of Russian weapons, because the famous words of the commander: "My daughter's chastitydearer to me than life and my own honor.", - were not only the words of a loving father. They testified to the deep invincibility of his spirit. Therefore, the Suvorov army was invincible, because it lived according to the gospel commandments, constituting a single spiritual whole with its commander. She could always fearlessly go to her death “For God, the Tsar and the Fatherland!”. And this made our state strong, in which the Orthodox people lived and believed in this way.

How important it is for us today to touch with our souls this patriarchal chastity, faithfully preserving the pious customs of our ancestors. They built their lives according to the word of God. Then neither grandfathers nor grandchildren parted with the lives of the saints. The spiritual heritage of the holy fathers and teachers of the Church was a source of innermost thoughts about oneself and about life. The life-giving word of Holy Scripture and Holy Tradition was conceived as an incorruptible treasure of the spirit.

So the modern pastoral word explores and verifies our fleeting and changing life with the eternal word of God, which guides the priest, who is always at the epicenter of human problems. For this, like the apostles, the “words of eternal life” are revealed to him.

“In the old days, concern for a future wedding did not overtake parents suddenly. Almost from birth, they collected a dowry estate for the girl, figured out the worries of her son's marriage. In rich houses of the upper classes, various benefits were recorded for children: villages, houses, money was saved. In a peasant family, the girl was preparing a styling-chest: fur coats, blankets, dresses, towels. The guy was saving up for the wedding. Without renouncing the division, they tried to prepare an extra sleigh, buy a forest, a tool. Already the baby had his own property: it was customary to give “by the tooth”, and later “money” for the name day for the future household. Thus, from childhood, the child, meeting with objects and conversations related to his future marriage, thought about an independent family life.

Wedding celebrations were the brightest event in a series of family holidays. They stood out for their long and well-established rituals, very special and magnificent dresses. Gifts. Songs. It didn't last one day. There were many guests at the wedding. It also had educational value. An older sister or aunt, a neighbor in a wedding dress, “like a princess”, became the center of attention of the whole family, the whole street, the parish. The girl looked, mentally trying on such an unusual care and love of loved ones and, of course, a rich dress. The boy looked at an older relative or brother friend and also thought about the unprecedented honor with which the groom is surrounded. Hoping to experience the same someday. In conversations, the children discussed wedding gifts for a long time, the list of which, by ordinary chance, became the property of relatives and neighbors.

These gifts also captivated the children's imagination. “Why, why does he have such respect and gifts? What did he do that he deserved? thought the child. They asked mother and father. “You will be hardworking and modest, and you will be married. We will sew you a beautiful dress. “Be a good helper to your father, don’t be lazy, don’t be mischievous - they’ll give a good girl for you,” the mother probably answered. From gifts and boots, the child's attention switched to virtues. Virtue received a real reward - the right to be an enviable bride, an enviable groom. Sin also had a visible and tangible punishment. “Who will take you, clumsy ?!”, “Who will they give for you, unlucky ?!”.

Once upon a time, the attention of our compatriots was not so scattered. Anxiety for the health of the pope or an unprecedented flood in Brazil did not disturb the hearts. But more spiritual strength remained for their own, family affairs and concerns. For the future marriage of a son or daughter, serious preparations were made. Morality, industriousness, religiosity, household skills, neatness, health, obedience to parents, the fun of possible applicants for relatives did not escape the attention of others. All impressions and information fit into the memory until the time, then to make the only right choice for the happy fate of a daughter or son. They also tried to give a look to their “goods”, so that later there would be no reproaches from relatives. “Mother made me wash it five times. She ran a handkerchief around the corners, checking if it was clean. She said: “When you get married, it will be a sin on me that I raised a slut.” You won’t linger at the gate either, they will definitely shout from the house that there’s nothing, they say, to look out for the street, ”one woman told about her upbringing.

Both boys and girls remembered that “good fame lies, and bad fame runs,” and tried not to give a reason for bad fame, because the retribution for a prank in the future could be a shameful refusal during matchmaking, or even loneliness.

The fact that a teenager's thoughts often turned to a future marriage does not mean that he developed carnal daydreams. There was nothing lustful in these thoughts. The wedding attracted the imagination of the young by highlighting, revealing to those around them the real dignity of a person. Not everyone could realize this, but everyone felt it ”(Priest Sergius Nikolaev. To the grooms and brides. M., p. 5-9).

So slowly lived Mother Russia, accommodating in her every day the simple wisdom of pious being, inherited from generation to generation, firmly knowing that without this it is impossible to calmly look into the future. This is a lesson to all young people and to all parents who should know that in order to be with lit candles at the lectern, the bride and groom will need their whole life under their parents' roof. From the way of life that exists in the paternal house of the bride and groom, subsequently the main wealth of the new family is formed.

About parental blessing, or who chooses the bride?

There were times when the bride and groom first met only in the church at the wedding. Parental blessing and will were an indisputable law. The obedience and piety of children was rewarded by the Lord Himself.

In order to find out the will of God, it used to be that the whole family prayed for a long time at the holy relics of God’s saints, ordered prayers from miraculous icons, went to monasteries to spiritual elders, to whom the human heart is open and God’s providence for those who ask for advice is visible. Such a conversation is known between the reverend and the benefactor of the Diveevo monastery, Nikolai Alexandrovich Motovilov, which took place in October 1831.

Motovilov told the elder his innermost secret. For more than ten years, his heart has been given to the pious maiden Ekaterina Mikhailovna Yazykova. But the marriage did not work out in any way, which made Nikolai Aleksandrovich unusually sad, because in the image of his first love he found for himself the truly Christian ideal of a self-sacrificing female heart and did not think to look for or wish for anyone else.

The Monk Seraphim listened to him with attention, asking about everything in detail. And unexpectedly he told Motovilov that the bride, who was destined for him from God, is now still small, she is only a little over eight years old. And then the elder revealed to the astonished Nikolai Alexandrovich those circumstances that would serve their acquaintance in the future and further happy marriage.

“After all, it’s different, your love of God, to ask the Lord God to foretell someone a bride, as you, for example, are asking now that I, a poor one, ask the Lord to foretell Yazykov as a bride, but it’s different when the Lord is already Himself to whom he deigned to foretell which bride, as, for example, for your love of God. Your bride is now no more than eight years and three or four or five months old. Believe me, this is exactly true, and I myself, poor Seraphim, am ready to testify to you in this ... I am not talking about the present time, but about the future. After all, I told you that life is great, and a lot happens in life. So this is how it will happen to you in advance that they will reproach you for some girl, and vilify her for you, then then do not forget the requests and prayers of the wretched Seraphim - marry this girl!

“And the Father for the third time bowed to me, a sinner, to the face of the earth, and I again fell at his feet.

Standing up and looking directly into my eyes, Father Seraphim began to look at me vigilantly and, as if looking into my very soul, asked:

Well, father, will you fulfill the request of the wretched Seraphim?

And I said

- If God deigns to fulfill, then I will try to do as you wish!
“Well,” Father Seraphim said, “thank you! Do not forget this girl! ... And she, I tell you, poor Seraphim, she is like an angel of God both in soul and in flesh ..

But maybe you will be embarrassed when I tell you her title? .. She is a simple peasant woman! .. But do not be embarrassed by this, your love of God: she is your sister according to our forefather Adam, and according to our Lord Jesus Christ!

Then Batiushka began to talk about how we should live with my future wife, and ended his conversation by repeating his request, begging us not to forget either his request or the conversation, and then he let go in peace, without saying anything about Yazykova ...

... At the indicated time, Motovilov still had no idea either about Diveev, or about the role that over time he was supposed to play in the fate of this last lot on earth of the Queen of Heaven.

Elena Milyukova, an eight-year-old girl at that time, could even less suspect that someday she would marry, and even a rich nobleman, who in the future would stand at nothing to fulfill the covenant of her Father, and in a worldly guise would become that servant of the Mother of God and Serafimov, as he later became by the wondrous sight of God ”(Nikolai Alexandrovich Motovilov and the Diveevo Monastery. Edition of the Holy Trinity-Seraphim-Diveevo Convent, 1999, p. 42,45-46,48.)

Since marriages are made in heaven, it means that one must learn to hear the will of God about oneself, which is revealed to a Christian through the prayer life of his heart turned to God.

On the blessing of the confessor

When the question of marriage is decided by church people, then the blessing of the spiritual father or the parish priest is necessary, with whom the bride and groom usually confess.

Obedience to the confessor helps to avoid those mistakes that are so often made due to the lack of life and spiritual experience.

When does a church wedding take place?

For a church wedding, the bride and groom must choose a day to perform the sacrament of the wedding and first agree with the priest. You need to know that marriage takes place on special days established by the church - on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. The exception is the days on the eve of the Twelve, temple and great holidays. And also in continuation of all posts: Veliky, Petrov, Uspensky and Rozhdestvensky.

In continuation of Christmas time - from January 7 to January 20, during Maslenitsa, as well as during Bright Week; on the eve and on the day of the memory of the Beheading of John the Baptist - September 11; on the eve and on the feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross - September 27.

The wedding itself is a separate service performed in the church after the liturgy. On the same day or the day before, the bride and groom partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ in order to proceed to the sacrament of the wedding in spiritual purity.

“Our Divine Liturgy, and especially the Eucharist, is the greatest and constant revelation to us of the love of God! - Testifies the shepherd of God, the holy righteous.

For the bride and groom who are preparing to create a new family - a home church - being in the Divine Service, especially on such a day for them, is the best spiritual strengthening. After all, the Lord Himself receives them at His wedding feast, which is the Holy Eucharist. It is no coincidence that in the Gospel the Kingdom of Heaven is more than once likened to marriage and a wedding feast.

About the symbolism of wedding rings

The sacrament of the wedding is preceded by the betrothal of the bride and groom. In the old days, it was performed separately from the wedding and was a test of fidelity and love, the pledge of which was wedding rings.

The word “betrothal” itself, as V.I. Dahl (Explanatory Dictionary of the Living Great Russian Language by V.I. Dahl in 4 vols., Russian language, 1999, v.2, p.616.) comes from the word “hoop”, or “ring”, which is an ancient symbol of eternity. And since the purpose of marriage is to achieve an imperishable image of eternity, then an indispensable condition for its completion is the exchange of rings between the bride and groom.

In the ancient Church, the bishop, performing the betrothal blessing, offered the following prayerful wish:

“Bless, Lord, this ring… for as it crowns a man’s finger… so may the grace of the Holy Spirit surround the bride and groom, so that they see sons and daughters up to the third and fourth generation, who may praise Your name.”

Thus, the bride and groom, “as children of the light,” according to the words of the Apostle Paul (Eph. 5:8), testify to everyone that they are pure and chaste before God. The flame of candles illuminates the beginning of a new life, where light is the source of God's holiness. Union in the Lord necessarily attracts the grace of God. “Where two or three are gathered in my name, there I am in the midst of them” (). The bride is handed over to the groom and the husband receives her from God and His Church, according to the word of blessed Simeon. (Works of Blessed Simeon, Archbishop of Thessaloniki, St. Petersburg, 1856, p. 353.) All brides are beautiful, like snow-white lilies. They delight the eye and gladden the heart. It is no coincidence that the Archangel Gabriel appeared to the Virgin Mary with a lily flower - a symbol of chastity and purity.

What does burning newlyweds mean?

When the bride and groom stand with lighted candles, the priest performs the cruciform censing of the newlyweds. Thus, he calls on them the grace of the Holy Spirit, reminding us of the events from the Old Testament book of Tobit, which tells of the marriage of Tobias, the son of Tobit, to the daughter of Raguel Sarah, destined for him by God as a wife. And in order for the will of God to be done, an evil spirit was near Sarah, which kills all the suitors, leading both the bride and her parents to despair.

Tobiah and Sarah fervently prayed that the Lord would bless their marriage. The prayer of the newlyweds was heard. The Archangel Raphael, who brought Tobias to his bride's house, taught him how to drive away the enemy force with censing (Book of Tobit, chapters 6-8.). Thus, cruciform incense means the invisible, mysterious presence with us of the grace of the Holy Spirit, sanctifying us for good deeds.

How is a betrothal done?

When the priest burns the bride and groom standing with lit candles in the temple, the Church lifts up prayers, asking God for the peace that the newlyweds need, prays for sending them perfect love and help, grace for immaculate residence, for only the One God grants an honorable marriage and a bed bad. The Church prays for deliverance from all sorrow, anger and need, turns to the Most Blessed Lady of the Most Holy Theotokos for intercession and salvation.

In her prayers, the Church again brings us back to the times of the Old Testament. We remember Isaac and Rebekah, whom the Lord Himself chose for each other. And the priest, citing them as an example, asks God's blessings for the betrothal of the bride and groom coming here, so that "the union of love can be made unbreakable for them."

Then the priest blesses first the bridegroom and then the bride three times crosswise with the rings that were consecrated on the holy throne of this church.

The priest accompanies the first step of the union of the groom and the bride with the words: “The servant of God (the name of the groom is called) is betrothed to the servant of God (the name of the bride is called) in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, now and forever and forever and ever. Amen". And then he addresses the bride with the same words: “The servant of God (calls her name) is betrothed to the servant of God (calls his name) in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, now and forever and forever and ever. Amen".

The marital union bears in itself a pledge of unity and eternity. The rings are put on the fingers of the right hands, signifying a blessing on every good deed - “... and the right hand of Your servant will be blessed” - says the text of the prayer read by the priest after the betrothal. The rings testify to the grace-filled help in preserving marital love, unfading thanks to God's mercy.

What does the white board under the feet of the bride and groom mean?

With the singing of the psalm of King David "Blessed are all who fear the Lord ..." the bride and groom with lit candles go to the middle of the temple and stand in front of the lectern, on which lie the Holy Gospel and the cross of Christ. By this, the Church shows that in all the ways of their lives, in all undertakings, spouses must follow the gospel commandments. And the Cross of Christ the Savior should strengthen them spiritually in carrying their own cross commanded by the Lord to all Christians.

Under the feet of the newlyweds, a white towel or white cloth is a symbol of unity and the joy of inseparable residence in marriage. Like the bride's wedding dress, this snow-white fabric speaks of the purity and chastity of those entering into marriage, that their thoughts, feelings and deeds are also impeccable in relation to each other and to the Lord.

What do the bride and groom make vows to God during the wedding?

When church hymns cease and it becomes quiet in the temple, the priest addresses the instructive word of the Church to the bride and groom, which prepares them for the pronunciation of marriage vows.

Vows are given by believers either in gratitude to the Lord for the provided heavenly help, or when praying for God's help. Violation of the vows made to God constitutes a sin against the third commandment of the Law of God: "Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain."

Therefore, before the vows are pronounced, the priest asks the newlyweds, starting with the groom: “Do you (calls his name) have a good will and unconstrained and strong thought to take as your wife (calls the name of the bride) ...” The consent of the groom testifies that from now on he is ready to take full responsibility for his family on his shoulders and will take care of both his wife and children, with whom the Lord will bless their union, from now on he recognizes himself as the head of the family in the image of Christ, who is the Head of the Church, for whose unspeakable love ascended the Cross of Calvary.

And the next question of the priest: “Did you not promise another bride?” The groom’s negative answer testifies to his prudence and a clear conscience, fidelity and readiness to be the steward of his family, as a servant of Christ and steward of the Mysteries of God (): “From stewards it is required that everyone be faithful.”

The same questions are offered by the priest and the bride: “Do you have a good and unconstrained will, and a firm thought, take this (groom’s name) as your husband ...” By her answer, the bride testifies that she knows the calling of a wife and mother and she is ready to be a faithful helper to her husband , a loving wife and a virtuous mother, according to the words of the wise Solomon: “Who will find a virtuous wife? Its price is higher than pearls; her husband's heart is confident in her, and he will not be left without profit; she repays him with good, and not with evil, all the days of her life ”().

The bride’s answers: “I have, honest father”, “I didn’t promise, honest father” also testify to her good temper and piety, her readiness to be a reliable support in life for her husband and children.

The marriage vows of the bride and groom confirm before God and the Church the voluntariness and inviolability of their intentions. In a Christian marriage, such evidence is the main condition for recognizing the bride and groom as husband and wife.

“You put crowns on their heads…”

When the wedding vows are pronounced by the bride and groom, the priest proceeds to perform the sacrament of the wedding. Like any church action, it begins with a prayerful petition, invoking the blessing and mercy of God on all those who pray. The priest recalls the God-blessed marriages of the holy forefathers and calls on the future family the blessing of the Lord, which Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, Joseph and Aseneth, Zechariah and Elizabeth were honored with; the priest recalls the blessing of the married couple by the Lord in Cana of Galilee and asks Him, who is invisibly coming here, to bless the union of the servants of God, whose names he loudly calls and prays for the granting of a peaceful and long married life, blessing to future children and well-being to the whole house.

In the next prayer, the priest prays to the Lord to save the couple, as Noah and his whole family were saved in the ark, as Jonah miraculously escaped in the belly of the whale, and the three youths in the cave of Babylon found heavenly coolness in the fire.

A special petition is also raised to the Lord for parents, whose prayers “affirm the foundations of houses” ().

And now comes the moment of mystery, when the priest places crowns on the blessed couple - a sign of royal power.

The priest, taking the crown, marks the bridegroom with a cross and gives him to kiss the image of the Savior, attached to the front of the crown and consecrating it. When crowning the bridegroom, the priest says: “The servant of God (calls his name) is married to the servant of God (calls the name of the bride) in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.”

Having blessed the bride in the same way and allowing her to venerate the image of the Most Holy Theotokos that adorns her crown, the priest crowns her, saying: “The servant of God (the name of the bride) is married to the servant of God (the name of the groom) in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.”

By laying on crowns, the Church gives the bride and groom a special honor for the spiritual feat of maintaining chastity before marriage.

At the exclamation of the priest: “Lord our God, crown me (them) with glory and honor,” the sacrament of marriage is performed. The Church proclaims those who are married to be the founders of a new Christian family - a small church. The church blessing marks the eternity and indissolubility of the born union: “What God combined, let no man separate” ().

Who are the wedding witnesses?

When the priest places crowns on the head of the bride and groom, they are received and held by their godparents, or witnesses. Behind the bride is her friend, and behind the groom is her friend. They are the prayer guardians of this marriage, spiritual mentors, therefore “they must be Orthodox and God-loving” (Composition of Blessed Simeon, Archbishop of Thessaloniki, 1856, St. Petersburg, p. 357.), - Blessed Simeon adds.

What does the word of the holy Apostle Paul and the gospel reading about the wedding feast in Cana of Galilee teach husband and wife?

Both the word of the Apostle Paul to the church community of Ephesus and the gospel reading about the feast in Cana of Galilee speak of the main thing - of obedience as an immutable law of all relationships between Christians.

“Whatever He tells you, do it,” says the Mother of God. And behold, they did as it was said, and suddenly they found wine in the vessels in abundance.

And the holy Apostle Paul calls on believers: “Submit to one another in the fear of God” (Eph. 5:21). That is, for the sake of Christ, for the sake of love for Him. And peace enters their homes and hearts, and the Lord blesses them, granting them earthly and heavenly blessings.

The marriage union is like the indissoluble unity of Christ and His Bride-Church, going in the name of love for each other to a voluntary sacrifice on the cross. The Lord, in the name of love and salvation of mankind, ascends to Golgotha. The Church, whose faithful children, by life for the glory of God and by death for the holy Orthodox faith, testified to their love for God throughout two millennia of unceasing spiritual warfare.

What does the drinking of wine from a common cup by young people symbolize?

After reading the Gospel, the Church again lifts up its prayers for the newlyweds. Then the priest brings a cup of wine and, having blessed it, gives it to the newlyweds. The bride and groom take turns drinking from it to commemorate from now on their inseparable being, both spiritual and bodily, and also as evidence of their unity in good thinking about God.

About walking around the lectern

Then the priest joins the right hands of the spouses as a sign of their unity in Christ and covers them with the end of the stole, which symbolizes the handing over to the husband through the hands of the priest of the wife from the Church Itself. Then he, holding a cross in his hands, circles them three times around the lectern, on which lies the Gospel. The circle at all times served as a sign of eternity, therefore walking around the lectern symbolizes the indissolubility of the concluded union. It is performed three times in honor of the Holy Trinity.

Following the priest, the newlyweds sing church troparia, the meaning of which reveals the hidden meaning of their marriage as unity in Christ to serve God.

“Isae rejoice, Virgin in the womb, and give birth to the son of Emmanuel, God and man, the east is His name: He is great, we bless the Virgin.”

This is how the Church sings of the most joyful event in the Universe - the Nativity of Christ. This hymn, in the context of what is happening at the moment in the temple, reveals to the newlyweds that the birth of their family is now in the series of church events and has the same goal as the God-manhood - the salvation of each other for eternal life with Christ.

Then the troparion “Holy martyr, who suffered well and was married, pray to the Lord, have mercy on our souls” is sung.

This is a prayerful appeal to those who accepted voluntary suffering, which brought the crown of martyrdom, and through this were made worthy of the Kingdom of Heaven. The Church thus tells us that good spouses, through the patience of sorrows, are likened to Christians who have acquired crowns of martyrdom for their feat on the cross of confessing faith in Christ.

At the end, the troparion “Glory to Thee, Christ God, praise of the apostles, joy of the martyrs, their preaching, consubstantial Trinity” is sung.

This hymn recalls that the path of the gospel of Christ awaits every Christian, for according to the words of the Apostle Paul: “The heart believes unto righteousness, the mouth confesses unto salvation” (). Following this path, the husband and wife must first of all be a worthy example for their children and faithful helpers to each other.

Parting word of the Church

In the old days, the newlyweds stayed for seven days covered with crowns, and only on the eighth day they were allowed to leave the temple with a special order. In modern practice, the removal of the crowns takes place at the end of the solemn procession. The priest says a short prayer about this. But for the rest of their lives, these crowns will invisibly adorn the husband and wife, if they always follow the truth of God, keep peace and love for each other.

The wedding concludes with a special prayer for the newlyweds, in which the priest asks the Lord for a blessing for their whole life, as well as goodness and longevity. He also addresses the Mother of God, who asked the Lord for mercy for the newlyweds in Cana of Galilee.

In this prayer petition, the divinely crowned saints Equal-to-the-Apostles Empress Helena and Tsar Constantine, who are especially revered by the Church, are also remembered. They were the first of the earthly kings to accept the Christian faith and affirm it as the state faith, bringing the entire universe subject to them into the bosom of the Holy Church of Christ.

In prayer for the newlyweds, the Church addresses the Holy Great Martyr Procopius, who, by his sufferings for Christ, inspired twelve noble women to acquire the crowns of martyrdom, who ascended the cross as if at a wedding feast.

By such examples, the newlyweds are called by the Church to keep apostolic zeal in their hearts and serve God with their labors, for from now on they are a small church, blessed on the day of their wedding by our Lord Jesus Christ.

“Many and good years ...” the Church sings to the newlyweds, and the priest addresses them with a pastoral word, which they must listen with special attention, for on a whim during the performance of the sacrament, the priest speaks a word not so much from himself, but revealed to him by the Lord by the grace of the priesthood , says exactly what is important for those coming before him and before God. His word will be about the most necessary in the field of family life, where they are called to serve their neighbors and God.

On the indissolubility of church marriage

Church marriage is indissoluble, except in the event of the death of one of the spouses or the guilt of adultery. Holy Scripture testifies to this:

“A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; if her husband dies, she is free to marry whomever she wants, only in the Lord. ().

“They are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate.”

“To the unmarried and to the widows I say: it is good for them to remain as I am; but if they cannot abstain, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to be inflamed.”

“But I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for the guilt of fornication, he gives her a reason to commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery" ().

What can hinder Christian marriage?

The Orthodox Church considers civil marriage devoid of grace as a human dispensation, but as a fact it recognizes and does not consider it illegal cohabitation. However, the conditions for concluding a marriage under civil law and according to church canons differ. Not every civil marriage can be consecrated by the Church.

The Church does not allow marriage more than three times, while civil law allows fourth and fifth marriages, which the Church does not bless.

A wedding is impossible if one of the spouses is not baptized and is not going to be baptized before the wedding, or if one of the spouses came to the wedding at someone else's will.

A wedding is not possible if one of the spouses is actually married to another person. This requires the dissolution of a civil marriage, and if the marriage was church, it is imperative to take the permission of the bishop to dissolve it and the blessing to enter into a new marriage.

An obstacle to marriage is the blood or spiritual relationship of the bride and groom. If they are christening recipients of the same person, then their marriage cannot be blessed by the Church.

About the wedding meal

The Holy Church warns against irreverent behavior after the sacrament of the wedding, both the newlyweds themselves and the invited guests. Canon 53 of the Council of Laodicea says: “It is not fitting for those who go to marriage to skip or dance, but to dine and dine modestly, as befits Christians.” The wedding feast should be free from all intemperance and indecency. Witnesses at the wedding should take care of this, who, according to Russian custom, are both honored guests and pious reasonable hosts at the wedding celebration.

About married life

The decree of one of the Councils of Carthage says: "The bride and groom, upon receiving a blessing, must spend the next night in virginity out of reverence for the blessing received."

The Church condemns the intemperate conduct of the "honeymoon" by young spouses. Their restraint and moderation will be rewarded with quiet joy and happiness of the first days of a new, joint life.

Also, abstinence is required according to church canons on all Sundays and holidays, days of communion, repentance and fasting. The reverend said to a young man entering into marriage: “... And also keep clean, keep Wednesdays and Fridays, and holidays, and Sundays. For not keeping cleanliness, for not observing Wednesday and Friday by spouses, children will be born dead, and if the holidays and Sundays are not kept, wives die in childbirth.

The elder wrote the same thing in one letter: “Your wife’s illness, perhaps, was due to your own fault: either they didn’t honor holidays in marital relations, or they didn’t observe marital fidelity, for which you are punished by your wife’s illnesses.”

The ability to restrain oneself in married life brings good fruits of spiritual peace and prosperity in the family, strengthens the husband and wife spiritually, makes them able to withstand the sorrows and trials that are inevitable in family life, educates them capable of sacrifice and self-restraint.

Which saints to pray for a successful marriage?

In all Orthodox prayer books one can find prayers for various occasions of family life. The Lord hears our every prayerful sigh, but in life we are surrounded by exactly what is beneficial for the salvation of our soul, which is priceless in the eyes of God. “Knock and it will be opened...,” the Lord tells us.

They pray for a blessing for marriage to the Most Holy Theotokos in honor of Her icon "Kazanskaya", to the right-believing Prince Peter and Princess Fevronia, miracle workers of Murom.

For advice and love between husband and wife, they pray to the holy apostle and evangelist John the Theologian.

About every family and everyday need - the holy blessed Xenia of Petersburg.

When childless, they pray to the righteous god-fathers Joachim and Anna, the holy prophet Zechariah and Elizabeth. If you wish to have a male child - to the reverend.

About the upbringing of children in Christian piety - the martyr Sophia and St. Sergius of Radonezh.

About help in everyday affairs, about the blessing of God over the house - to the Hieromartyr Blaise, Bishop of Sebaste.

"Without God is not up to the threshold"

We hope that our story about the sacrament of the church wedding will help the reader to think seriously about himself. The last generations of Russians have dropped out of church life and have been deprived of any religious experience for almost a hundred years. Most of us continue to live like this, following generally accepted standards, drifting among the temptations of this world. Is there a place for eternity among this roar, crowd and circulation? Can the Lord knocking on our hearts be heard? Isn't such a life like a painted sun that neither shines nor warms?

But as soon as you cross the threshold of the temple, as soon as you join your heart to common prayer, as a previously unknown being will reveal to us the innermost joy of communion with God. Then the centuries-old experience of Russian life, embodied in the simple words “Without God, it’s not up to the threshold,” will become obvious and indisputable.

In concluding our story about a church wedding, let us recall the main thing - this sacrament is a special blessing of the Church, the Head of which is the Lord Himself. Therefore, it is so important to approach it prepared, collected, pure, without deceit, so that it does not come to condemnation, but to the salvation of the soul. Then family life will have a solid, unshakable foundation. And all the prayers uttered on this day in the temple will bear their good fruits, “for with God no word will remain powerless” ().

To the organization weddings should be taken seriously. First of all, decide on which day and in which temple you would like. Today, in most there is a preliminary record, thanks to which you can even choose the time of the ceremony. The presence of the newlyweds at the time of registration is not required, any of your relatives can do this. If there is no preliminary entry in your chosen one, then you need to issue a receipt for the weddings right on the wedding day. In this case, it is impossible to name the exact time of the sacrament; the priest will be able to conduct it only after other things. But on the other hand, you can agree to conduct the ceremony with a certain priest, if there is a need for this. You need to prepare not only organizationally, but primarily spiritually. Before performing the sacrament, the bride and groom must observe a three-day fast, attend evening services, confession, and. The priest will tell you exactly what prayers should be on these days. Also, during the time it is necessary to refrain not only from animal products - meat, eggs - but also from marital relations. On the wedding day, the newlyweds must come to the temple for the beginning of the service, before that you can’t eat or drink anything, smoke and perform marital duty. In the temple, the bride and groom pray and then take communion. After that, there is time to change into wedding clothes, while it is better for the bride to give preference to comfortable shoes, otherwise several hours of standing in high heels can turn into real torture. Wedding rings must be given to your wedding priest in advance so that he can consecrate them. During the ceremony, the newlyweds must wear underwear, and the bride must have a headdress. It can be a veil if you are getting married on the day of the official wedding, or a scarf or scarf. During the ceremony, the presence of relatives and friends is allowed, but filming the process weddings or taking photographs is not allowed in all temples.