How to get rid of feelings of anxiety and anxiety inside? How to relieve anxiety at home.


Inexplicable fear, tension, anxiety for no reason periodically occur in many people. An explanation for unreasonable anxiety can be chronic fatigue, constant stress, previous or progressive diseases. At the same time, a person feels that he is in danger, but does not understand what is happening to him.

Why anxiety appears in the soul for no reason

Feelings of anxiety and danger are not always pathological mental states. Every adult has at least once experienced nervous excitement and anxiety in a situation where it is not possible to cope with a problem that has arisen or in anticipation of a difficult conversation. Once these issues are resolved, the anxiety goes away. But pathological causeless fear appears regardless of external stimuli, it is not caused by real problems, but arises on its own.

Anxiety for no reason overwhelms when a person gives freedom to his own imagination: it, as a rule, paints the most terrible pictures. At these moments, a person feels helpless, emotionally and physically exhausted, in connection with this, health may be shaken, and the individual will fall ill. Depending on the symptoms (signs), there are several mental pathologies that are characterized by increased anxiety.

Panic attack

An attack of a panic attack, as a rule, overtakes a person in a crowded place (public transport, institution building, large store). There are no visible reasons for the occurrence of this condition, since at this moment nothing threatens the life or health of a person. The average age of those suffering from anxiety for no reason is 20-30 years. Statistics show that women are more likely to experience unreasonable panic.

A possible cause of unreasonable anxiety, according to doctors, may be a person’s prolonged exposure to a situation of a psycho-traumatic nature, but single severe stressful situations are not excluded. A great influence on the predisposition to panic attacks has a heredity, a person's temperament, his personality traits and the balance of hormones. In addition, anxiety and fear for no reason often manifest themselves against the background of diseases of the internal organs of a person. Features of the feeling of panic:

  1. Spontaneous panic. Occurs suddenly, without auxiliary circumstances.
  2. situational panic. Appears against the background of experiences due to the onset of a traumatic situation or as a result of a person’s expectation of some kind of problem.
  3. Conditional panic. It manifests itself under the influence of a biological or chemical stimulant (alcohol, hormonal imbalance).

The following are the most common symptoms of a panic attack:

  • tachycardia (rapid heartbeat);
  • feeling of anxiety in the chest (bursting, pain inside the sternum);
  • "lump in the throat";
  • increased blood pressure;
  • development of VVD (vegetovascular dystonia);
  • lack of air;
  • fear of death;
  • hot/cold flushes;
  • nausea, vomiting;
  • dizziness;
  • derealization;
  • impaired vision or hearing, coordination;
  • loss of consciousness;
  • spontaneous urination.

anxiety neurosis

This is a disorder of the psyche and nervous system, the main symptom of which is anxiety. With the development of anxiety neurosis, physiological symptoms are diagnosed that are associated with a malfunction of the autonomic system. Periodically there is an increase in anxiety, sometimes accompanied by panic attacks. An anxiety disorder, as a rule, develops as a result of prolonged mental overload or one severe stress. The disease has the following symptoms:

  • feeling of anxiety for no reason (a person is worried about trifles);
  • intrusive thoughts;
  • fear;
  • depression;
  • sleep disorders;
  • hypochondria;
  • migraine;
  • tachycardia;
  • dizziness;
  • nausea, digestive problems.

An anxiety syndrome does not always manifest itself as an independent disease; it often accompanies depression, phobic neurosis, and schizophrenia. This mental illness quickly develops into a chronic form, and the symptoms become permanent. Periodically, a person experiences exacerbations, in which panic attacks, irritability, tearfulness appear. A constant feeling of anxiety can turn into other forms of disorders - hypochondria, obsessive-compulsive disorder.

hangover anxiety

When drinking alcohol, intoxication of the body occurs, all organs begin to fight this condition. First, the nervous system takes over - at this time intoxication sets in, which is characterized by mood swings. After that, a hangover syndrome begins, in which all systems of the human body fight alcohol. Hangover anxiety symptoms include:

  • dizziness;
  • frequent change of emotions;
  • nausea, abdominal discomfort;
  • hallucinations;
  • jumps in blood pressure;
  • arrhythmia;
  • alternation of heat and cold;
  • causeless fear;
  • despair;
  • memory losses.

Depression

This disease can manifest itself in a person of any age and social group. As a rule, depression develops after some traumatic situation or stress. Mental illness can be triggered by the severe experience of failure. Emotional upheavals can lead to a depressive disorder: the death of a loved one, divorce, a serious illness. Sometimes depression appears for no reason. Scientists believe that in such cases, the causative agent is neurochemical processes - a failure of the metabolic process of hormones that affect the emotional state of a person.

Manifestations of depression can be different. The disease can be suspected with the following symptoms:

  • frequent feeling of anxiety for no apparent reason;
  • unwillingness to do the usual work (apathy);
  • sadness;
  • chronic fatigue;
  • decrease in self-esteem;
  • indifference to other people;
  • difficulty concentrating;
  • unwillingness to communicate;
  • difficulty in making decisions.

How to get rid of worry and anxiety

Everyone experiences anxiety and fear from time to time. If at the same time it becomes difficult for you to overcome these conditions or they differ in duration, which interferes with work or personal life, you should contact a specialist. Signs that you should not delay going to the doctor:

  • you sometimes have panic attacks for no reason;
  • you feel an inexplicable fear;
  • during anxiety, he catches his breath, jumps up pressure, dizziness appears.

With medication for fear and anxiety

A doctor for the treatment of anxiety, getting rid of a feeling of fear that occurs for no reason, may prescribe a course of drug therapy. However, taking drugs is most effective when combined with psychotherapy. It is not advisable to treat anxiety and fear exclusively with drugs. Compared to people using mixed therapy, patients who only take pills are more likely to relapse.

The initial stage of mental illness is usually treated with mild antidepressants. If the doctor notices a positive effect, then maintenance therapy is prescribed lasting from six months to 12 months. Types of drugs, doses and time of admission (in the morning or at night) are prescribed exclusively for each patient individually. In severe cases of the disease, pills for anxiety and fear are not suitable, so the patient is placed in a hospital where antipsychotics, antidepressants and insulin are injected.

Among the drugs that have a tranquilizing effect, but are dispensed in pharmacies without a doctor's prescription, include:

  1. "Novo-passit". Take 1 tablet three times a day, the duration of the course of treatment for causeless anxiety is prescribed by a doctor.
  2. "Valerian". 2 tablets are taken daily. The course is 2-3 weeks.
  3. "Grandaxin". Drink as prescribed by a doctor, 1-2 tablets three times a day. The duration of treatment is determined depending on the patient's condition and the clinical picture.
  4. "Persen". The drug is taken 2-3 times a day, 2-3 tablets. Treatment of causeless anxiety, feelings of panic, anxiety, fear lasts no more than 6-8 weeks.

Through psychotherapy for anxiety disorders

An effective way to treat unreasonable anxiety and panic attacks is cognitive-behavioral therapy. It aims to transform unwanted behavior. As a rule, it is possible to cure a mental disorder in 5-20 sessions with a specialist. The doctor, after conducting diagnostic tests and passing tests by the patient, helps a person to remove negative thought patterns, irrational beliefs that fuel the emerging feeling of anxiety.

The cognitive method of psychotherapy focuses on the patient's cognition and thinking, and not just on his behavior. In therapy, a person struggles with their fears in a controlled, safe environment. Through repeated immersion in a situation that causes fear in the patient, he gains more and more control over what is happening. A direct look at the problem (fear) does not cause damage, on the contrary, feelings of anxiety and anxiety are gradually leveled.

Features of treatment

Feelings of anxiety are perfectly treatable. The same applies to fear for no reason, and it is possible to achieve positive results in a short time. Among the most effective techniques that can remove anxiety disorders include: hypnosis, sequential desensitization, confrontation, behavioral therapy, physical rehabilitation. The specialist chooses the choice of treatment based on the type and severity of the mental disorder.

generalized anxiety disorder

If in phobias fear is associated with a specific object, then anxiety in generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) captures all aspects of life. It is not as strong as during panic attacks, but is longer, and therefore more painful and more difficult to endure. This mental disorder is treated in several ways:

  1. Cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy. This technique is considered the most effective for the treatment of causeless feelings of anxiety in GAD.
  2. Exposure and prevention of reactions. The method is based on the principle of living anxiety, that is, a person completely succumbs to fear without trying to overcome it. For example, the patient tends to get nervous when someone from the family is delayed, imagining the worst that could happen (a loved one had an accident, he was overtaken by a heart attack). Instead of worrying, the patient should give in to panic, experience fear to the fullest. Over time, the symptom will become less intense or disappear altogether.

Panic attacks and anxiety

Treatment of anxiety that occurs without fear causes can be carried out by taking medications - tranquilizers. With their help, symptoms are quickly eliminated, including sleep disturbance, mood swings. However, these drugs have an impressive list of side effects. There is another group of drugs for mental disorders such as feelings of unreasonable anxiety and panic. These funds are not potent, they are based on medicinal herbs: chamomile, motherwort, birch leaves, valerian.

Drug therapy is not advanced, since psychotherapy is recognized as more effective in combating anxiety. At the appointment with a specialist, the patient finds out what exactly is happening to him, because of which the problems began (causes of fear, anxiety, panic). After that, the doctor selects suitable methods of treating a mental disorder. As a rule, therapy includes drugs that eliminate the symptoms of panic attacks, anxiety (pills) and a course of psychotherapeutic treatment.

Video: how to deal with unexplained anxiety and anxiety

There are plenty of reasons for the emergence of a state of anxiety: these are imperfect relationships with children, and work problems, dissatisfaction in the personal sphere.

The body instantly reacts to the negative flow of thoughts:

  • heart rhythm is disturbed (as a rule, the heartbeat quickens, a tingling sensation may appear, the heart contracts);
  • intermittent breathing (or, conversely, there are so long pauses between breaths that discomfort is felt, the person seems to forget to breathe);
  • embraces either fussiness or apathy - just thinking about the scale of the problem does not want to do anything;
  • the brain refuses to work productively, even performing routine tasks requires a lot of effort.

Faced with such an unpleasant condition, first of all, I want to solve the problem with the help of medicines. But, firstly, only a doctor can make such appointments; secondly, such drugs negatively affect other body systems.

Treating anxiety at home can help you manage your anxiety. We have compiled 18 effective recommendations for dealing with anxiety in adults.

1. Chamomile.

This is a kind of "ambulance" - a cup of tea from flowers and twigs of a plant brings a sense of peace immediately. The effect is provided by the substances present in the composition of the plant. In their effect on the body, they are identical to such tranquilizers as diazepam (they bind to the same dopamine receptors as the compounds in pharmaceutical drugs).

Chamomile flowers also contain the active ingredient apigenin. Thanks to its antispasmodic action, this flavonoid soothes, relieves pain symptoms, and helps to relax.

Chamomile can help (when taken for a long time, at least a month) even in the treatment of generalized anxiety disorder.

2. Green tea.

Perhaps it is this drink that helps Buddhist monks to maintain peace and concentration during many hours of meditation - green tea has been present in their diet for 13 centuries.

L-theanine has a calming effect on all body systems. Amino acid normalizes heart rate, pressure indicators, reduces anxiety. Those who consume 4-5 servings of the drink a day are more calm and focused. In addition, green tea is included in the group of natural remedies that protect against the development of cancer.

3. Hops.

It is used not only in the preparation of a popular foamy drink, but also to relieve anxiety.

Hop cones are easy to harvest on your own (in mid or late August). Hops are harvested when the inside of the cones turns yellow-green with a pinkish tinge. It is necessary to pay attention to the weather conditions, ripening can also occur at the end of July - (if the summer is hot).

The sedative properties of the plant are manifested not only when brewed, but hop essential oil, its tincture and extract are also useful for relieving anxiety. But the taste of tea is not pleasing - it is very bitter, so it is better to combine hop cones with mint, chamomile, honey. If the goal is to improve sleep, it is good to add valerian to the hops (for example, by making a fragrant sachet).

When using other sedative drugs, it is not recommended to combine them with taking hop cones. It will not be superfluous to inform the doctor about the desire to use this natural remedy to combat anxiety.

4. Valerian.

Some of the remedies listed above reduce anxiety, but do not have a sedative effect (like green tea, for example). But valerian is from a different group: the plant causes drowsiness, contains sedative compounds that help fight insomnia.

Not everyone likes the taste and smell of the plant, so valerian tea is not as popular as a tincture or capsule preparation. To improve the taste, the plant can be combined with mint or lemon balm, honey.

When taking this medicine, plan your day so that after taking it you no longer need to drive and perform tasks that require precision and concentration. Valerian greatly relaxes both the body and the brain.

5. Melissa.

Another plant that has been used since the Middle Ages to reduce stress levels, solve sleep problems.

Melissa is safe and beneficial only if used in moderation. Exceeding the dosage is fraught with an increase in anxiety. Therefore, it is necessary to take infusions, tea, capsules, lemon balm balm, starting with small portions (for infusion - no more than 150 ml per day). It is undesirable to use this remedy for hypotensive patients, since lemon balm reduces pressure.

6. Passiflora.

Passionflower - the second name of passionflower - along with drugs relieves anxiety attacks, is used to treat insomnia.

May cause drowsiness, enhances the effect of other sedatives. Passionflower is best used as a one-time remedy to help relieve anxiety (in extreme cases, use no more than two weeks).

7. Lavender.

The heady aroma of the plant soothes, helps to balance the emotional state. Often the smell of lavender can be felt in the waiting room of dental clinics or other medical institutions. And this is not an accident: it has been experimentally proven that the aroma has a calming effect, helping those waiting for a doctor's appointment to relax.

In another study, the smell of lavender oil was inhaled by students during exams. And although the level of anxiety decreased, some students noted a decrease in concentration. Therefore, people whose work requires good coordination, quick reaction, should carefully use lavender products.

8. Omega-3 fats.

Those who have had to deal with the treatment of heart disease, this group of fats is well known. Omega-3s (for example, fish oil) help to restore the patency of blood vessels, restore their elasticity. They are useful when you need to calm your nerves, get rid of a depressive mood.

There are omega-3s in salmon, anchovies, sardines, mussels, vegetable oils (olive, linseed), nuts. But it is preferable to draw on omega-3 reserves from seafood, in which the concentration of these substances is higher.

9. Exercise.

Sports are good for both muscles and joints, and for the brain. Moreover, they can also be used as an urgent remedy to help relieve stress, and have an effect in the long term.

Physical activity increases self-esteem, makes you feel healthier. You can evaluate the result of efforts objectively - both in appearance and in well-being. Improving health deprives even people who are prone to reflection from a cause for concern.

10. Holding your breath.

Short-term hypoxia, and then filling the body with oxygen, can reduce anxiety. You can use a technique borrowed from yoga, it is called "breathing at the expense of 4-7-8".

Before letting air into the lungs, you need to make a powerful exhalation (through the mouth). Inhale for four counts (with your nose), do not breathe for 7 seconds, then exhale as powerfully as at the beginning (for 8 seconds). 2-3 repetitions a day are enough. This practice is also useful in the treatment of insomnia.

11. Correction of sugar levels.

Often irritability and anxiety increase for a banal reason - a person is hungry. As a result, sugar levels drop, which affects mood and behavior.

Keep a quick snack with you: nuts (raw and unsalted), whole grain bread, fruit, dark chocolate, a sandwich with lean meat and herbs.

Snacking on processed foods (sausages, smoked meats), sweets only exacerbates the condition due to sharp jumps in glucose levels. Very soon the body will again require food, will return to a state of irritation.

12. Effect 21 minutes.

If the thought of systematic exercise is scary, it is enough to find only 21 minutes a day in your schedule - this time period is enough to relieve anxiety.

At the same time, it is necessary to choose an aerobic exercise: running, jumping, walking on an elliptical (or ordinary) ladder, in extreme cases, a regular walk is also suitable (if you keep a high pace).

13. Mandatory breakfast.

Those who suffer from increased anxiety often skip breakfast. The excuse can be too heavy workload (when every minute, especially in the morning, is expensive), and lack of appetite, and fear of gaining weight.

Choosing the right products will not only charge you with a good mood for a long time, but will also have a beneficial effect on your figure. One of the obligatory dishes during the morning reception should be scrambled eggs (boiled eggs, scrambled eggs are also suitable). This product fills the body with protein, healthy fats, which allows you to feel full longer. There is choline in eggs - a low content of this element in the body provokes anxiety attacks.

14. Refusal of negative thinking.

When anxiety attacks, there is no room left for positive thoughts, and pictures, one scarier than the other, scroll over and over again in the head. Moreover, the probability of such a bad development of the situation can be negligible.

This flow of negativity must be stopped as early as possible, using the practice of deep breathing and considering the problem from all sides. If the situation is worked out soberly, without emotions, it becomes clear that everything is fixable, the order of necessary actions will immediately emerge.

15. Sauna or bath.

When heated, the body relaxes, muscle tension subsides, and anxiety decreases.

Under the influence of heat, even the neutron networks that control mood (including those responsible for the production of serotonin) change. It is not for nothing that after the procedure there is a feeling of peace, calmness, the head literally clears up.

16. Walk in the forest.

The Japanese know a lot about maintaining health - including emotional. The popular practice of shinrin-yoku helps restore psychological balance.

The procedure is also available to residents of other countries - this is an ordinary walk along forest paths. It is preferable to visit a coniferous forest, having received a portion of phytoncides as a bonus.

The surrounding aromas, sounds, and the need to walk on uneven ground also have a calming effect on the psyche. After just 20 minutes of walking, stress levels are significantly reduced.

17. Mindfulness meditation.

This Buddhist practice is effective in treating anxiety disorder. It helps to realize the importance of every moment, and to critically evaluate what is really happening, and not the terrible pictures drawn by the imagination under the influence of panic.

You can start with a simple concentration on what is happening, the most ordinary things, the main thing is not to let your consciousness slip into fantasy (especially with a negative color).

18. Statement of the problem.

The search for ways to deal with increased anxiety already indicates that a person has realized the problem. The ability to analyze your emotional state, draw the right conclusions is a good sign and the first step towards improving your condition.

When you know the problem in person, it is easier to solve it. The next steps include working on developing a positive mindset (such as reframing) and making lifestyle changes.

Constantly being in a state of anxiety over time destroys not only emotional health, but also physical. Use these tips to manage stress, and if you don't see improvement, seek help from a professional.

Fear is a natural human emotion that occurs under certain conditions. The personality is in constant development, knowledge of something unknown, new. Some people are open to new experiences, some are fearful and anxious.

Anxiety and fear are often synonymous in the context of the same situation. Anxiety occurs in a person during experiences, fear can also relate to any experiences, or arise suddenly. These emotions and feelings can protect us from something, but also interfere with our active life. Therefore, the logical question is: “How to overcome the feeling of fear and anxiety when they are excessive?”

Fear and anxiety are not the same concepts. They have a significant difference. Sometimes the nature and even illness of a person depends on their manifestation. Excessive anxiety, various phobias can lead to a personality disorder, a pathological perception of the environment.

Fear is a defense mechanism of the psyche that tries to protect us from danger. This feeling is transmitted to some extent by inheritance, when already small children are afraid of snakes or wasps, heights and so on. Since childhood, parents have been claiming negative, terrible consequences if a child climbs higher than it should, waving his arms in front of a wasp.

Fear has changed over time, such fears arise that no longer save us from problem situations, but, on the contrary, prevent us from performing any functions, achieving our goals. Excessive fear of any object or situation is already a phobia. This condition negatively affects the state of the psyche, even the somatic health of a person. The emotion of fear arises in the situation that has taken place.

Anxiety is like a warning about danger. A person feels anxiety not about the event or situation that has taken place, but before it. This emotion refers to the mental process of imagination, when a person thought up problems for himself, because of which he began to worry. Many people confuse anxiety with intuition. Intuition refers to hypersensitivity, can orient a person to good and bad in her life. Anxiety focuses a person on the expectation of something bad, negative, problematic. This may be an individual feature of a person, a consequence of education, problems with the physiological health of the patient.

Reasons for fear and anxiety

Any mental disorder, diseases of organs and systems, may be accompanied by anxiety. Especially a person suffers from unreasonable anxiety in diseases of the nervous system.

Some types of temperament are also characterized by the appearance of anxiety in different situations. For example, melancholic or choleric people may react with anxiety to new changes in life. For melancholics, in general, each new difficult situation seems beyond his strength, problems are impossible, and conflicts are eternal. Anxiety in them appears more often than in phlegmatic or sanguine people. These are features of temperament, and if they do not interfere with a person’s life, they are taken as the norm.

Unreasonable anxiety, which arises unintentionally, refers to a symptom of neurosis. In this case, it is not just about distracting a person from a causal situation, but about psychological or medical assistance.

So, the causes of anxiety and fear are:

  1. A threat to something important and significant for a particular person, this significant can be realized by a person, or be in the sphere of the unconscious.
  2. Biological theory says that anxiety can arise due to an imbalance of genes in the brain.
  3. Reflex response to a specific stimulus. It often occurs after a psychological trauma.
  4. Insufficient or excessive physical activity can also cause increased levels of anxiety and fear.
  5. Improper nutrition leads to such symptoms. For the normal course of mental processes, a sufficient amount of vitamins and trace elements is necessary. If they do not constantly enter the body, a person may develop anxiety.
  6. A hormonal disorder in the body, a harbinger of a heart attack, a drop in blood sugar levels, neurosis, schizophrenia, alcoholism - all these conditions are accompanied by anxiety and the possible appearance of fear.

What can a person be afraid of?

Everything, anything. The occurrence of phobia and anxiety can be associated with different objects or life situations. In medicine, the following main types of anxiety are distinguished:

How does this condition manifest itself?

This is a debilitating state for a person. When anxiety overcomes, a person does not rest, but is constantly immersed in his thoughts. Such constant brainstorming leads to the fact that the brain does not rest, it is constantly loaded with work. Anxiety and fear are manifested by physiological symptoms:

The mental state of a person also suffers, he is constantly tense internally. He is even more worried about the feeling of insecurity, uncertainty, helplessness that appeared along with anxiety. The concentration of attention decreases, irritability, intolerance appear. A person's self-esteem suffers, he begins to avoid communicating with people. A person feels loneliness, concentrates on his shortcomings, hence there is a lack of realization in the profession, a violation of communication, problems in his personal life.

You can’t stop worrying and being afraid with a wave of your hand. Overcoming an anxiety state is a process that requires considerable effort on the part of the person himself, and the doctor, as well as the surrounding understanding relatives. An attempt to "pull yourself together" to get rid of fear may be unsuccessful, perhaps even exacerbating anxiety about the inability to cope with your emotions. What kind of help can be obtained from specialists to solve the problem of anxiety?

Treatment and help: how to get rid of anxiety and fear?

Treatment and care for this condition includes the use of medication and psychological assistance.

medical treatment

Regulation of cognitive processes in the manifestation of anxiety and fear, assistance with somatic manifestations of this condition, is carried out through the use of the necessary medical means. They affect the human nervous system, reducing its excitability, some of them have a sedative effect.

Psychotropic drugs are used for treatment, which are able to suppress anxiety, relieve the severity of fear, emotional stress. Some of them have a positive effect on cognitive processes, improving mental performance.

There are drugs with moderate sedative properties, some of the anxiolytics do not suppress the activity of the nervous system. Nootropics are also used for manifestations of anxiety.

Psychotherapy

The main task of a specialist psychologist or psychiatrist is to determine the psychological cause of such behavior. After exploring the depths of the subconscious, he brings to awareness the cause of anxiety. After that, the question becomes how to deal with this feeling?

The specialist helps to identify a person’s irrational beliefs, forming clear and rational ones from them, allowing you to take a fresh look at your problem. The doctor in the process of work helps a person:

  • define the problem;
  • formulate the goals of its solution;
  • work out solutions;
  • talk about how to apply certain solutions;
  • evaluate the effectiveness of the chosen solution.

The doctor should not dive into the content of the problem, it is important to pay attention to the thinking and emotional reactions of a person. He needs to explain to the client the importance of changing the way of thinking, to show readiness for changes in life.

With anxiety, active sports, positive communication and good deeds to others help. So a person can remove the symptoms of the disorder, overestimate their actions.

Brianna Wist

American writer and journalist.

1. The opposite of addiction is not inner balance, but contact with reality. The same applies to anxiety. Anxiety is manifested in the fact that a person ceases to be present in the present moment, he is cut off from what is happening, from other people and from himself. At times like these, you need to reconnect with reality.

2. Allow yourself to want what you really want. Without this, you cannot. It doesn't matter what you want: to find a life partner, to find a new job, to earn more money, to get the recognition of colleagues. Just be aware and accept this, even if you think others will see you as superficial, flawed, or feel that you don't "love yourself" enough.

3. If you're having trouble understanding what you really want, take a closer look at your deepest hidden fears. What is hidden on their wrong side? This is what you want.

4. Be grateful for whatever makes you uncomfortable. The sad and surprising fact is that happy people usually have no incentive to develop, they are happy with everything. If you experience any discomfort, this should be a signal to you that you are on the threshold of something new and better, but you need to act to achieve this.

5. Constructiveness and productivity should be your best friends. It's not about ticking boxes by completing tasks from a hundred-point list. At the end of each day, you should know that today you managed to do something (anything!) useful for yourself.

6. You can usually get rid of "unreasonable" anxiety by doing some specific practical activity. Anxiety over trifles usually indicates the existence of real problems that you are avoiding solving.

7. You must start from where you are now, use what you have and do what you can do. Everything else is an escape from problems, real life and yourself. Change is the result of long and persistent development. If you think otherwise, then you live in illusions that do not allow you to cope with what is bothering you.

8. Try to consciously connect with someone or reconnect with people who are already present in your life. It can be just one person that you trust and interact with. This interaction will be the starting point for the formation of a healthy emotional attachment. Needing love does not mean showing weakness.

9. Buy a notebook specifically so that when you feel yourself twisting into a pretzel, write down everything that comes to your mind, even if it seems terrible, disgusting, shameful or full of self-hatred. Do not keep thoughts and feelings to yourself! When you do this a few times, you will notice that you really get better.

10. The only thing you need to do when you are overcome by anxiety or panic is to try. At such moments, you lose the clarity of thought, so in this state you should not make any important decisions and take on any obligations. Find out what can help you calm down (a little snack, a bath, a conversation, or any activity that you really enjoy), and before you start doing anything, get yourself out of the negativity.

11. You need to understand how to live in the present moment, even if this way of life and thinking scares you, causes boredom, seems unattainable. The appearance of anxiety gives us a signal that we are too much stuck in thoughts about the past or the future, and this affects what decisions we make in the present.

12. You must take some action to get rid of what prevents you from embodying your true desires.

Real change happens at the level of actions. A person begins to do something completely differently, not the way he did it before.

Cheryl Straid, American writer and essayist

13. Read. If you don't read anything, then the reason is probably not that you don't enjoy reading itself, but that you haven't found a book that could captivate you. What you read now will affect how you will be in decades to come. Search the Internet for articles and essays in which people talk about how they cope with theirs. Knowing that many people you don't know is experiencing the same feelings will stop you from feeling alone in your problems. Read about what you find difficult to understand, about what terrifies or delights you. Just read, damn it!

14. You can take control of your feelings. It's important to remember this. It's not difficult at all. Just say to yourself, "I don't want to feel the way I feel right now, so I'm going to focus on other aspects of this problem."

15. If you believe that you can’t just take it and become happy, you can’t influence what you feel and what you think, you will sentence yourself to an extremely difficult life. In that case, you do not need to read this article anymore, because only the belief to the contrary can help you deal with problems.

16. You will not get rid of anxiety and fear forever. If you care about what's going on in your life, and you're at least a little interested in what's going on around you, then you will always encounter something that causes fear or anxiety. Your ultimate goal is not to eliminate these feelings once and for all. You need to train your mind so that you feel happy despite stressful factors and not fall into a stupor when they appear. That's all.

17. To gain such control over their thinking, some people will only need to change the focus of perception of what is happening. Others will have years of treatment with various drugs and therapies and such active work on themselves, which they have never done before. This is the battle of our lives and the main debt that we must pay to ourselves. If you want to fight with someone, let it be you.

18. Any problem is not a problem as such. A problem remains a problem as long as you perceive it that way. Your internal alarm system should be sounding an alarm now because it doesn't fit with your habitual way of thinking and behaving. This does not mean that you are racing towards endless, inevitable suffering. This suggests that somewhere deep inside you understand that you can live differently, better. This means you know what you need, even if it scares you.

19. Choose love. It may sound like annoying useless advice, but you should not part with people who make your eyes shine, you should not give up what you love to do (even if it is not related to your work), give up your innermost desires. Choose love, even if that choice scares you. In fact, your fear of doing something is commensurate with your desire to do it.

20. Learn, including the pain. This does not mean that you should use it as an excuse for irresponsible behavior. You need to learn to acknowledge that you feel pain, express it in understandable words and accept the fact that sometimes you have to experience such emotions.

21. Learn to get rid of the inner emotional slagging. For example, if you don't allow yourself to accept the fact that your ex has hurt you a lot and feel that pain, you will constantly project your negative experience onto your new partner, afraid that he will hurt you too, believing that you should not even try to start a new relationship. Thus, you will reproduce exactly the situation that you are most afraid of. This can only be avoided by understanding and accepting your feelings. Sometimes life is cruel, unfair, sometimes it just inspires horror. However…

We all lie in the gutter, but some of us look up at the stars.

Oscar Wilde

22. Separate the sensations in your body from what you think they are talking about. When you're upset, ask yourself how your body is really feeling at the moment. Most likely, it will be just a slight tension or discomfort. Everything else you just figured out yourself.

23. You don't have to trust all your emotions. According to conventional wisdom, it is emotions that should be followed, but this is very unreasonable, given the various reasons that can cause them (random thoughts, memories, and so on). If you blindly trust all your feelings, they will constantly unbalance you. Determine for yourself which of your feelings really mean something, and which do not.

24. Use the most powerful self-development technique: imagine yourself from the future. If you are wondering if you need to have children or not, just imagine being 75 years old. Would you like to be surrounded by family members, or would you be quite comfortable living alone? Imagine what your life will be like in three years. Would you be happy that you didn't try to save the relationship, that you didn't make any savings, or that you spent a lot of time watching TV when you could have written a book, started your own business, or started making music?

Imagine your life through the eyes of the person you aspire to be. This will help you decide on the solution to many issues that bother you.

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