“In order to live honestly, one must tear, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again and quit again, for peace is a meanness of the soul. “In order to live honestly, one must be torn, confused, fought, made mistakes ...” (Based on Tolstoy’s novel “War and Peace”)

1. The hero of the epic novel "War in Peace" Pierre Bezukhov.
2. Moral quest of Bezukhov.
3. Spiritual and moral formation of Pierre Bezukhov.

Human life is complex and multifaceted. At all times, there were moral values, to step over which meant forever incurring disgrace and contempt. The dignity of a person is manifested in his striving for high goals. I would like to dedicate my essay to the hero of Leo Tolstoy's epic novel "War and Peace" Pierre Bezukhov. This amazing person cannot but arouse interest. Pierre is focused on his personality, but he is not immersed in himself. He is keenly interested in life around. For him, the question is very acute: “Why live and what am I”? This question is of great importance to him. Bezukhov thinks about the meaninglessness of life and death, that it is impossible to find the meaning of being; about the relativity of all truths. Secular society is alien to Pierre, in empty and meaningless communication he cannot find his truth.

The questions that torment Pierre cannot be solved by mere theoretical reasoning. Even reading books can't help here. Pierre finds answers to his questions only in real life. Human suffering, contradictions, tragedies - these are all integral components of life itself. And Pierre is completely immersed in it. He approaches the truth, being at the epicenter of events, tragic and terrible * The spiritual formation of Bezukhov is somehow affected by war, the fire of Moscow, French captivity, the suffering of people with whom he encounters very closely. Pierre gets the opportunity to come face to face with the life of the people. And this cannot leave him indifferent.

On the way to Mozhaisk, Pierre was seized by a special feeling: “the deeper he plunged into this sea of ​​troops, the more he was seized by anxiety, anxiety and a new joyful feeling that he had not yet experienced ... He now experienced a pleasant feeling of consciousness that everything that constitutes the happiness of people, the comforts of life, wealth, even life itself, is nonsense, which is pleasant to put aside in comparison with something ... ".

On the Borodino field, Pierre understood “... the whole meaning and all the significance of this war and the upcoming battle ... He understood that hidden (la(enle), as they say in physics, the warmth of patriotism that was in all those people whom he saw , and which explained to him why all these people calmly and, as it were, thoughtlessly prepared for death.

After Pierre was next to the soldiers, imbued with their courage, it began to seem to him the most correct and wise to merge with them, with simple, but wise in their understanding of life, people. It is no coincidence that he says: "To be a soldier, a simple soldier! ... Enter this common life with your whole being, imbue with what makes them so."

Throughout his life, Pierre had many hobbies and disappointments. There was a period when Pierre admired Napoleon; there was also a period of passion for Freemasonry. However, in the process of moral rebirth, Pierre abandons his former hobbies and comes to the ideas of Decembrism. Communication with the common people had a huge impact on his formation. From the very first minutes of meeting Pierre, we understand that we have an outstanding, sincere, open nature. Pierre feels uncomfortable in secular society, and society does not accept him as his own, despite even the rich inheritance that Bezukhov received from his father. He is not like the regulars of secular salons. Pierre is too different from them to be his own.

In the process of communicating with soldiers, mainly with Platon Karataev, Pierre Bezukhov begins to understand life better. Now his thoughts are no longer abstract, speculative. He wishes to direct his forces to real actions that could help others. For example, Bezukhov seeks to help those who suffered from the war. And in the epilogue, he joins the secret society of the Decembrists. This decision was obviously influenced by everything he saw in the process of communicating with ordinary people. Now Bezukhov understands well all the contradictions of life, and, as far as possible, wants to fight them. He says: “There is theft in the courts, in the army there is only one stick: shagistika, settlements - they torment the people, they stifle enlightenment. What is young, honestly, is ruined!

Pierre not only understands and condemns all the contradictions and shortcomings of life. He has already reached that moral and spiritual development, when the intentions to change the existing reality are obvious and necessary: ​​"let there be not only virtue, but independence and activity."

The moral quest of Pierre Bezukhov makes his image especially interesting for us. It is known that the very fate of Pierre served as the basis for the idea of ​​the novel "War and Peace". The fact that the image of Pierre is shown in development speaks of the author's special disposition towards him. In the novel, static images are those that do not call for warm feelings from the writer.

Pierre cannot but delight readers with his kindness, sincerity, and directness. There are moments when his abstract reasoning, isolation from life, seem incomprehensible. But in the process of his development, he overcomes the weaknesses of his nature and moves from the need for reflection to the need for action.

The problems of morality and spirituality have always been the most important in the literature of the 19th century. Writers and their heroes were constantly worried about the deepest and most serious questions: how to live, what is the meaning of human life, how to come to God, how to change for the better not only their lives, but also the lives of other people. It is these thoughts that overwhelm one of the main characters of the novel, L.N. Tolstoy "War and Peace" by Pierre Bezukhov.

At the beginning of the novel, Pierre appears before us as a completely naive, inexperienced young man who has lived all his youth abroad. He can't lead

Himself in secular society, in the salon of Anna Pavlovna Scherer, he causes anxiety and fear of the hostess: “Although Pierre was indeed somewhat larger than the other men in the room, this fear could only relate to that intelligent and at the same time timid, observant and natural look that distinguished him from everyone in this living room." Pierre behaves naturally, he is the only one in this environment who does not wear a mask of hypocrisy, he says what he thinks.

Having become the owner of a large inheritance, Pierre, with his honesty and faith in the kindness of people, falls into the nets set by Prince Kuragin. The prince's attempts to seize the inheritance were unsuccessful

Success, so he decided to get money in another way: to marry Pierre to his daughter Helene. Pierre is attracted by her outward beauty, but he cannot figure out if she is smart or kind. For a long time he does not dare to propose to her, in fact, he does not do it, Prince Kuragin decides everything for him.

After marriage, there comes a turning point in the life of the hero, a period of reflection on his whole life, its meaning. The culmination of these experiences of Pierre was a duel with Dolokhov, Helen's lover. In the good-natured and peaceful Pierre, who learned about the impudent and cynical attitude towards him of Helen and Dolokhov, anger boils, "something terrible and ugly rose in his soul." The duel highlights all the best qualities of Pierre: his courage, the courage of a man who has nothing to lose, his philanthropy, his moral strength. Having wounded Dolokhov, he is waiting for his shot: “Pierre, with a meek smile of regret and remorse, helplessly spreading his legs and arms, stood directly in front of Dolokhov with his broad chest and looked sadly at him.”

The author compares Pierre with Dolokhov in this scene: Pierre does not want to harm him, let alone kill him, and Dolokhov laments that he missed and did not hit Pierre. After the duel, Pierre is tormented by thoughts and feelings: “Such a storm of feelings, thoughts, memories suddenly arose in his soul that he not only could not sleep, but could not sit still and had to jump up from the sofa and walk around the room with quick steps”

He analyzes everything that happened, the relationship with his wife, the duel and understands that he has lost all life values, he does not know how to live on, blames only himself for making this mistake - marrying Helen, reflects on life and death: “Who is right, who is guilty? Nobody. And live - and live: tomorrow you will die, as I could die an hour ago. And is it worth it to suffer when one second remains to live compared to eternity? …What's wrong? What well? What should you love, what should you hate? Why live and what am I? What is life, what is death? What power governs everything? In this state of moral doubt, he meets the freemason Bazdeev at the inn in Torzhok, and the “strict, intelligent and penetrating expression of the gaze” of this man strikes Bezukhov.

Bazdeev sees the cause of Pierre’s misfortune in his disbelief in God: “Pierre, with a sinking heart, looking with shining eyes into the face of a freemason, listened to him, did not interrupt, did not ask him, but with all his heart believed what this stranger told him.” Pierre himself joins the Masonic lodge and tries to live according to the laws of goodness and justice. Having received a vital support in the form of Freemasonry, he gains self-confidence and a purpose in life. Pierre travels around his estates, trying to make life easier for his serfs. He wants to build schools and hospitals for the peasants, but the cunning manager deceives Pierre, and there are no practical results of Pierre's trip. But he himself is full of faith in himself, and during this period of his life he manages to help his friend, Prince Andrei Bolkonsky, who is raising his son after the death of his wife.

Prince Andrei is disappointed in life after Austerlitz, after the death of the little princess, and Pierre manages to stir him up, arouse interest in his surroundings: “If there is God and there is a future life, then there is truth, there is virtue; and the highest happiness of man is to strive to achieve them. We must live, we must love, we must believe that we do not live today only on this piece of land, but have lived and will live forever there, in everything.

Tolstoy shows us how a period of reflection on one's life can be replaced by complete disappointment and despair, which is what happens to his favorite hero. Pierre loses faith in the teachings of the Freemasons when he sees that they are all busy not with the organization of the world, but with their own careers, prosperity, and the pursuit of power. He returns to secular society and again lives an empty, meaningless life. The only thing he has in life is love for Natasha, but an alliance between them is impossible.

The war with Napoleon gives meaning to Pierre's life: he is present at the Battle of Borodino, he sees the courage and heroism of the Russian soldiers, he is next to them on the Raevsky battery, brings them shells, helps in any way he can. Despite his absurd appearance for battle (he arrived in a green tailcoat and white hat), the soldiers were imbued with sympathy for Pierre for his courage and even gave him the nickname "our master."

The terrible picture of the battle struck Pierre. When he sees that almost everyone on the battery has died, he thinks: “No, now they will leave it, now they will be horrified at what they have done!” After the battle, Pierre reflects on the courage of Russian soldiers: “To be a soldier, just a soldier! To enter this common life with the whole being, to be imbued with what makes them so ... The most difficult thing is to be able to combine the meaning of everything in one's soul .... No, not to connect. You can’t connect thoughts, but to connect all these thoughts - that’s what you need! Yes, you need to match, you need to match!

To match one's life with the life of the people - that's the idea Pierre comes to. Further events in Pierre's life only confirm this idea. An attempt to kill Napoleon in burning Moscow turns into saving the life of a French officer, and saving a girl from a burning house and helping a woman turns into a prisoner. In Moscow, Pierre accomplishes his feat, but for him this is the natural behavior of a person, since he is brave and noble. Probably the most important events in Pierre's life take place in captivity.

Acquaintance with Platon Karataev taught Pierre the necessary wisdom in life, which he lacked. The ability to adapt to any conditions and not lose humanity and kindness at the same time - this was revealed to Pierre by a simple Russian peasant. “For Pierre, as he presented himself on the first night, an incomprehensible, round and eternal personification of the spirit of simplicity and truth, he remained that way forever,” Tolstoy writes about Platon Karataev. In captivity, Pierre begins to feel his unity with the world: “Pierre looked into the sky, into the depths of the departing, playing stars. “And all this is mine, and all this is in me, and all this is me!”

When Pierre is released, when a completely different life begins, full of new problems, everything that he has suffered and felt is preserved in his soul. Everything experienced by Pierre did not pass without a trace, he became a person who knows the meaning of life, its purpose. A happy family life did not make him forget about his destiny. The fact that Pierre enters a secret society, that he is a future Decembrist, is natural for Pierre. He spent his whole life suffering the right to fight for the rights of other people.

Describing the life of his hero, Tolstoy shows us a vivid illustration of the words that he once wrote down in his diary: “To live honestly, you have to tear, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again, and quit again, and forever fight and lose. And peace is spiritual meanness.

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The writing

“It’s funny for me to remember how I thought, and how you seem to think that you can arrange for yourself a happy and honest little world in which you can live calmly, without mistakes, without remorse, without confusion, and do everything only good. Ridiculous!.. To live honestly, you have to tear, get confused, fight, make mistakes, start and quit, and start again and quit again, and forever fight and lose. And peace is spiritual meanness. These words of Tolstoy from his letter (1857) explain a lot in his life and work. Glimpses of these ideas arose early in Tolstoy's mind. He repeatedly recalled the game, which he loved very much as a child.

It was invented by the eldest of the Tolstoy brothers - Nikolenka. “So, when my brothers and I were - I was five, Mitenka was six, Seryozha was seven years old, he announced to us that he had a secret, through which, when it was revealed, all people would become happy; there will be no illnesses, no troubles, no one will be angry with anyone, and everyone will love each other, everyone will become ant brothers. (Probably these were the “Moravian brothers”; whom he heard or read about, but in our language they were ant brothers.) And I remember that the word “ant” was especially liked, reminiscent of ants in a tussock.

The secret of human happiness was, according to Nikolenka, "written by him on a green stick, and this stick was buried by the road on the edge of the ravine of the Old Order." To find out the secret, it was necessary to fulfill many difficult conditions ... The ideal of the "ant" brothers - the brotherhood of people from all over the world - Tolstoy carried through his whole life. “We called it a game,” he wrote at the end of his life, “and yet everything in the world is a game, except for this ...” Tolstoy's childhood years passed in the Tula estate of his parents - Yasnaya Polyana. Tolstoy did not remember his mother: she died when he was not two years old.

At the age of 9, he also lost his father. A participant in foreign campaigns during the Patriotic War, Tolstoy's father was one of the nobles who were critical of the government: he did not want to serve either at the end of the reign of Alexander I, or under Nicholas. “Of course, I didn’t understand anything about this in my childhood,” Tolstoy recalled much later, “but I understood that my father never humiliated himself before anyone, did not change his lively, cheerful and often mocking tone. And this self-esteem, which I saw in him, increased my love, my admiration for him.

The teacher of the orphaned children of the Tolstoys (four brothers and sister Mashenka) was a distant relative of the family, T. A. Yergolskaya. “The most important person in terms of influence on my life,” the writer said about her. Auntie, as her pupils called her, was a person of a decisive and selfless character. Tolstoy knew that Tatyana Alexandrovna loved his father and her father loved her, but circumstances separated them. Tolstoy's children's poems dedicated to "dear aunt" have been preserved. He began writing at the age of seven. A notebook for 1835 has come down to us, entitled: “Children's fun. The first section…” Here are the different breeds of birds. Tolstoy received his initial education at home, as was customary then in noble families, and at the age of seventeen he entered Kazan University. But classes at the university did not satisfy the future writer.

A powerful spiritual energy awakened in him, which he himself, perhaps, was not yet aware of. The young man read a lot, thought. “... For some time,” T. A. Ergolskaya wrote in her diary, “the study of philosophy occupies his days and nights. He only thinks about how to delve into the mysteries of human existence. Apparently, for this reason, the nineteen-year-old Tolstoy left the university and went to Yasnaya Polyana, which he inherited. Here he tries to find a use for his powers. He keeps a diary in order to give himself “a report every day from the point of view of those weaknesses from which you want to improve”, draws up “rules for the development of the will”, takes on the study of many sciences, decides to improve. But the plans for self-education turn out to be too grandiose, and the peasants they understand the young master and do not want to accept his blessings. Tolstoy rushes about, looking for goals in life. He is either going to go to Siberia, then he goes to Moscow and spends several months there - by his own admission, “very carelessly, without service, without employment, without a goal”; then he goes to St. Petersburg, where he successfully passes the exams for the degree of candidate at the university, but does not complete this undertaking either; then he is going to enter the Horse Guards Regiment; then suddenly he decides to rent a postal station ... In the same years, Tolstoy was seriously engaged in music, opened a school for peasant children, took up the study of pedagogy ... In a painful search, Tolstoy gradually comes to the main thing to which he devoted the rest of his life - to literary creativity. The first ideas arise, the first sketches appear.

In 1851, together with his brother Nikolai Tolstoy, he went; to the Caucasus, where there was an endless war with the highlanders, he went, however, with the firm intention of becoming a writer. He participates in battles and campaigns, gets close to people new to him and at the same time works hard. Tolstoy conceived to create a novel about the spiritual development of man. In the first year of the Caucasian service, he wrote "Childhood". The story has been revised four times. In July 1852, Tolstoy sent his first completed work to Nekrasov in Sovremennik. This testified to the young writer's great respect for the magazine.

An insightful editor, Nekrasov highly appreciated the talent of the novice author, noted the important advantage of his work - "the simplicity and reality of the content." The story was published in the September issue of the magazine. So a new outstanding writer appeared in Russia - it was obvious to everyone. Later, "Boyhood" (1854) and "Youth" (1857) were published, which, together with the first part, made up an autobiographical trilogy.

The protagonist of the trilogy is spiritually close to the author, endowed with autobiographical features. This feature of Tolstoy's work was first noted and explained by Chernyshevsky. "Self-deepening", tireless observation of oneself was for the writer a school of knowledge of the human psyche. Tolstoy's diary (the writer kept it from the age of 19 throughout his life) was a kind of creative laboratory. The study of human consciousness, prepared by self-observation, allowed Tolstoy to become a deep psychologist. In the images he created, the inner life of a person is exposed - a complex, contradictory process, usually hidden from prying eyes. Tolstoy reveals, according to Chernyshevsky, "the dialectics of the human soul", i.e. "hardly perceptible phenomena ... of inner life, replacing one another with extreme speed and inexhaustible variety."

When the siege of Sevastopol began by the Anglo-French and Turkish troops (1854), the young writer sought to be transferred to the active army. The thought of defending his native land inspired Tolstoy. Arriving in Sevastopol, he informed his brother: "The spirit in the troops is beyond any description ... Only our army can stand and win (we will still win, I am convinced of this) under such conditions." Tolstoy conveyed his first impressions of Sevastopol in the story "Sevastopol in December" (in December 1854, a month after the start of the siege).

The story, written in April 1855, showed Russia for the first time the besieged city in its true grandeur. The war was depicted by the author without embellishment, without loud phrases that accompanied the official news about Sevastopol on the pages of magazines and newspapers. The everyday, outwardly disorderly bustle of the city that has become a military camp, the overcrowded infirmary, nuclear strikes, grenade explosions, the torment of the wounded, blood, dirt and death - this is the situation in which the defenders of Sevastopol simply and honestly, without further ado, did their hard work. “Because of the cross, because of the name, because of the threat, people cannot accept these terrible conditions: there must be another, high motivating reason,” Tolstoy said. “And this reason is a feeling that is rarely manifested, bashful in Russian, but lies in in the depths of everyone's soul is love for the motherland.

For a month and a half, Tolstoy commanded a battery on the fourth bastion, the most dangerous of all, and wrote Youth and Sevastopol Tales there between the bombardments. Tolstoy took care of maintaining the morale of his comrades-in-arms, developed a number of valuable military-technical projects, worked on creating a society to educate soldiers, and publishing a magazine for this purpose. And for him it became more and more obvious not only the greatness of the defenders of the city, but also the impotence of feudal Russia, which was reflected in the course of the Crimean War. The writer decided to open the eyes of the government to the position of the Russian army.
In a special note intended for transmission to the tsar's brother, he revealed the main reason for military failures: “In Russia, with such a powerful material force and the strength of its spirit, there is no army; there are crowds of oppressed slaves who obey thieves, oppressive mercenaries and robbers ... ”But an appeal to a high-ranking person could not help the cause. Tolstoy decided to tell Russian society about the disastrous situation in Sevastopol and the entire Russian army, about the inhumanity of the war. Tolstoy fulfilled his intention by writing the story "Sevastopol in May" (1855).

Tolstoy paints war as madness, making people doubt the mind. There is an amazing scene in the story. A truce is called to remove the corpses. The soldiers of the armies at war with each other "with greedy and benevolent curiosity strive one for the other." Conversations begin, jokes and laughter are heard. Meanwhile, a ten-year-old child wanders among the dead, picking blue flowers. And suddenly, with dull curiosity, he stops in front of the headless corpse, looks at it and runs away in horror. “And these people - Christians ... - the author exclaims, - will they not suddenly fall on their knees with repentance ... will they not embrace like brothers? Not! The white rags are hidden, and again the instruments of death and suffering whistle, honest, innocent blood is shed again, and groans and curses are heard. Tolstoy judges the war from a moral point of view. It exposes its influence on human morality.

Napoleon, for the sake of his ambition, destroys millions, and some ensign Petrukov, this "little Napoleon, little monster, is now ready to start a battle, kill a hundred people just to get an extra star or a third of the salary." In one of the scenes, Tolstoy draws a clash between "little monsters" and ordinary people. Soldiers, wounded in a heavy battle, wander into the infirmary. Lieutenant Nepshitshetsky and adjutant Prince Galtsin, who watched the battle from afar, are convinced that there are many malingerers among the soldiers, and they shame the wounded, reminding them of patriotism. Galtsin stops a tall soldier. “Where are you going and why? he shouted at him sternly. “He…” but at that time, approaching the soldier quite close, he noticed that his right hand was behind a cuff and bloody above the elbow. - Wounded, your honor! - What hurt? “Here, it must have been a bullet,” said the soldier, pointing to his hand, “but already here I can’t know what hit my head,” and he, bending it, showed the bloodied, matted hair on the back of his head. - Whose gun is the other one? - Stutser French, your honor, took away; yes, I wouldn’t go if it wasn’t for this soldier to see him off, otherwise he would fall unequally ... ”Here even Prince Galtsin felt ashamed. However, shame did not torment him for long: the very next day, walking along the boulevard, he boasted of his "participation in the case" ... The third of the "Sevastopol stories" - "Sevastopol in August 1855" - is dedicated to the last period of defense. Again, before the reader is the everyday and even more terrible face of the war, hungry soldiers and sailors, officers exhausted by inhuman life on the bastions, and away from the fighting - quartermaster thieves with a very militant appearance.

From individuals, thoughts, destinies, the image of a heroic city is formed, wounded, destroyed, but not surrendered. Work on life material related to the tragic events in the history of the people prompted the young writer to determine his artistic position. Tolstoy ends the story “Sevastopol in May” with the words: “The hero of my story, whom I love with all the strength of my soul, whom I tried to reproduce in all its beauty and who has always been, is and will be beautiful, is true.” The last Sevastopol story was completed in St. Petersburg, where Tolstoy arrived at the end of 1855 as an already famous writer.

1. Just keep going

"It doesn't matter how slowly you go, as long as you don't stop." If you continue on the right path, you will eventually reach your desired destination. Hard work must be done consistently. A person who achieves success is one who remains committed to the idea and, despite the circumstances, moves towards his goal.

2. Your friends matter

"Never make friends with a person who is no better than yourself." Your friends represent the prophecy of your future. You are heading to where they already are. This is a good reason to look for friends who are moving in the same direction that you have chosen. So surround yourself with people with fire in their hearts!

3. You have to pay for good things.

“It is easy to hate and hard to love. Many things in our lives are based on this. Everything good is hard to achieve, and it is much easier to get something bad.” This explains a lot. It's easier to hate, easier to show negativity, easier to justify. Love, forgiveness, and generosity require a big heart, a big mind, and a lot of effort.

4. Prepare Your Tools First

“Life expectations depend on diligence and diligence. A mechanic who wants to perfect his work must first prepare his tools.” Confucius said, “Success depends on prior preparation, and without such preparation, failure is bound to happen.” Whatever you do in life, if you want to succeed, you must first prepare. Even the biggest failure can speed up the path to success.

5. There's nothing wrong with being wrong

There is nothing wrong with making a mistake if you don't keep remembering it. Don't worry about trifles. Making a mistake is not a great crime. Don't let mistakes ruin your day. Don't let negativity occupy your thoughts. There is nothing wrong with making a mistake! Celebrate your mistakes!

6. Pay attention to the consequences

"When you're angry, think about the consequences." Solomon said: “He who is patient is better than the brave, and he who controls himself is better than the conqueror of the city.” Always remember to keep your composure and think about the consequences.

7. Make adjustments

"If it is clear that the goals cannot be achieved, do not adjust the goals, adjust the actions." If your goals don't seem achievable this year, then now is a good time to agree on your plan to achieve them. Don't take failure as an option, set your sails for success and move smoothly towards your goal.

8. You can learn from everyone

“If I go with two other people, then each of them will act as my teacher. I will imitate the good traits of one of them, and correct in myself the disadvantages of the other. You can and should learn from everyone, be it a crook or a saint. Every life is a story filled with lessons ripe for collection. For example, you can take something good and useful for yourself from Will Smith's 7 life lessons or draw knowledge from Einstein's 10 golden lessons.

9. All or Nothing

"Whatever you do in life, do it with all your heart." Whatever you do, do it with full dedication or don't do it at all. Succeeding in life will require you to give the very best that you can, and then you will live without regrets.

I am pessimistic about life. You need to know this about me if we're going to date. I have a feeling that life is divided into two parts: the nightmarish and the bad. So two parts. Let's say it's nightmarish in the case of incurable diseases: I'm blind, someone is crippled ... It shocks me how people generally cope with life. Well, the bad part extends to everyone else.

There is an old joke. Two elderly women in a mountain resort. And one of them says: - Ugh... The food here is just awful. And the second replies: - Yes, indeed. Besides, they give so little! This is exactly how I think about life: loneliness, trouble, suffering, misfortune. And it all ends very quickly.

Life is an annoying trap. When a thinking person reaches maturity and comes to a mature consciousness, he involuntarily feels himself as if in a trap from which there is no way out. In fact, against his will, he was called by some accidents from non-existence to life ... Why?